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Hi everyone...

I have a question for you all.

My Khmer gf recently received her licence to be a tourguide in Phnom Penh.

She started mostly freelancing through the app "showaround".

I have three scenarios to ask your opinion on.

#1 Scenario #1

She got approached by a young guy from Mauritius. He wanted a full day of sight seeing. He was together with three friends (one of them female).

She could unfortunately not make it as she had a meeting with her boss (she works for an ngo). So she arranged for her friend to tour them. That evening she met up with the group and they went for dinner and to a few bars. (she didn't get paid for this, just free food and drinks.)

The next day the group was leaving Cambodia. The guy that initially approached her on the app asked her to meetup for a coffee. So she met him after their "tour was finished.

I said to her that I don't agree with her going on a coffee" date" with a client after the tour has finished (she could just have said that she is busy and he would still give her a good review).

#2 Scenario #2

A new client that she will guide for 4 days arrives at the airport at 7pm. She goes to pick him up from the airport. Bring him to his hotel and after that go for dinner resulting in her coming home by 10pm.

I said to her that she should just bring him to the hotel and let him have dinner in the hotel and tell her client she will be back for breakfast and they can go over the itinerary before heading out.

Then after a full day she knows who this person is and have dinner around 6pm and finish the day and not come home to late.

I've searched the showaround app and there are some perverts on there and after a full day you kind of know what kind of person you are guiding.

#3 Scenario #3

A guy approached her through the showaround app and wants to do 10 days of touring. Two days in the Capitol then to siem reap for a few days (she can't go to Siem reap herself so she arranged her friend to guide him there). She'll get paid $5 an hour in pp and $75 a day for trips outside of the city.

They will also go to kampot, on this trip my gf will bring her friend (the same girl that goes to Siem reap). And they'll have their own room in Kampot.

After Kampot the three (gf, friend and client) of them will go to Koh rong Samleam.

This will be during Christmas. According to my gf everything is fully booked so the guy booked a family room ($200 a night) with two separate beds.

I've told her that she don't know this guy and regardless of being in a relationship with me or not, that this is not okay to put yourself in a position where you might get abused. Cambodia as you all know attracts allot of perverts and sex tourists.

Through the show around app you have a rating system where clients can rate their guide and guides can rate their clients but some don't have any reviews.

Please let me know what you think (categorize it by scenario if possible)

Thanks

There are some people who come to Cambodia for the girls. They don't know if she is in a relationship. Some wouldn't care if she is. Some will try their luck, and see how she responds.

Not all travellers are like that. But she will come across some that are.

Sleeping in the same room is a red flag. Even if she has good intentions, he could get in her bed during the night. If he does, she may not tell you. So you will never know. Even travelling away together is a concern.

I don't know her. She might even be playing you. She might earn money on the side and not tell you.

How well do you know her? Do you think she has only good intentions?

One option is to look for another way she can earn money. If she speaks English well, there are probably a lot of jobs she could get. Consider the possibilities.

Another option is to limit the tour guide activities to during the day, and in town. Would she accept that.

A lot of it gets back to whether she feels the same way as you.

Wow! Maybe I'm old fashioned or something, but if she thinks that any of those scenarios are okay then you will probably be looking for a new gf soon.

Whats that saying,,,, She's only your girlfriend when she is with you. When she is with someone else she could be their girlfriend.

If she is your wife when she is with you ,,, she cannot be anyone elses wife.


Your other option is to get her pregnant, which will stop some customers in their tracks for a while.

Some, more background on my gf and our relationship.

We've known eachother for roughly 1.5yrs and been seriously dating for about a year. (She had been living with me full time for about a year)

When we started to become more serious one of the most important things to her was that if we had issues we would communicate these issues and resolve them (instead of most khmer, shutting up and going mental).

Our relationship has been really good and we have not had a bad time with fights or serious disagreements.

I don't believe she would cheat on me as we have been pretty open about our lives and I feel I can trust her.

She is in her final year of her bachelor (political science and international relationships). She has been working for a large ngo for the last two years and if our relationship is still good in two years we are planning to move to Europe so she can get her master there.

Green OK, red NO WAY!

#1 Scenario #1
Going to get a coffee seems harmless. No issue

#2 Scenario #2
Meeting the client at the airport and having dinner, OK for me. Just seems like a pain in the ass for her to deal with.

#3 Scenario #3
For her own safety she should be staying in separate rooms the entire time. Tour guides don't arrange to have the same rooms as their customers. This is a stranger

Equinix wrote: ↑Sun Dec 08, 2019 7:21 pm When we started to become more serious one of the most important things to her was that if we had issues we would communicate these issues and resolve them (instead of most khmer, shutting up and going mental).

So you can discuss these issues with her and see what happens.

Maybe turn the tables on her and simply ask her how she would feel if you went out one-on-one with female clients till 10pm, or went to sleep in the same bedroom as a female customer and so on. She should get the point if she's capable of putting herself in someone else's shoes. I wasn't capable of that myself until my girlfriend started rationalizing things this way with me, and I realized how much of a dick I could be.

Just to add on:
1) Seems unlikely she is going to be interested in dating some traveler who is about to head out of Cambodia for good after their 1-2 week trip
2) If she was the type to fool around, better to find out now and you can move on
3) I know nothing about that app, but it may be sensible for her to filter people somehow. For example "I am a professionally licensed tour guide, I am not interested in dating" or "my husband may join us for all or a part of the tour" even if you won't.

Mod edit: no need for derogatory speculation.