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All jokes and puns welcome provided some advice is given.

No funny business or "happy ending" needed... I've had incall massages before in Battambang for no extra fee, but I've never heard of one here. I usually go to 4-7$ massage places, but I like the idea of getting a massage in my own bed and quickly falling asleep afterwards. I find hopping on a bike and driving home suddenly wakes me up, as if I'd just had a nap. Does anyone know of cheap places or "freelance" -har har- massage therapists (if you can call them that) who do incalls? I'm not really willing to shell out 15$+ because I've had 8000riels massages that were equal in quality to U&ME SPA type places which charge 15-30$... Somewhere in the 5-8$ range, or is that now unrealistic in Phnom Penh? Maybe I should just ask my regular spots (since they know me and they're not too far) if they can send a girl over for a small motodop fee?

Let the "happy", "stroking" and "coming" puns commence...

What I would really like is one of those that is then safely escorted out. Do the whole massage on my back and legs and never wake me up to flip over, then just fuck off afterwards and let me sleep.

That's EXACTLY what I'm after... Like leave the money on the dresser and have her find her own way out afterwards... Pardon the sexually innuendo.

If you find it, send it my way.

Real troopers you are. " I need my personal valet to rub me til I sleep who will then promptly quietly excuse themselves in a safe manner and let me get my beauty sleep. "

Actually, not a bad service but you gotta have some kind of trust relationship with them ... And they can't steal a tip on the way out!

I'd start by making pals with a nearby reputable massage shop. Accountability, cause you know where to find them.

What it were a legitimate massage and the happy ending was included in the price? Decline?

nightmare.believer wrote:What it were a legitimate massage and the happy ending was included in the price? Decline?

That's just silly.

[EDIT: wait... would i have to wake up for it? or could we start with that... more of a happy beginning?]

Friend from Oz and I were getting massages at a definitely non-sexual place on 258 yesterday, as I was stumbling out in my house slippers the place was raided (I assume?) by two cops that looked very senior and very serious. The staff were clearly crapping themselves and quickly herded me out the door. It seemed a little bigger than tea money, and was clearly an unofficial visit - any thoughts?

Thoughts?
It was sexual. Perhaps you just never took the option...

Digg3r wrote:Thoughts?
It was sexual. Perhaps you just never took the option...

You may be right, it may even be that I don't put off the sort of vibe that attracts the offer of options. There is one ladyboy on Riverside that just wets him/herself with frustration every time s/he sees me, so maybe I just give the wrong signals altogether. Of course, it could just be that the staff at this place go to the same church as we do and the place is either genuinely non sexual or keen to appear that way to certain clients.