RedJohny wrote: ↑Sun Oct 27, 2019 6:19 pm
I moved to Phnom Penh two weeks ago and I struggle a bit to understand the local girls and "dating market". I lived in Bangkok for 2 years and it was quite easy to find a normal girl (for relationship or friendship) on Tinder or approach a girl on the street. But in Cambodia all of my matches on Tinder seems to be hookers or fake profiles. I can see many cute girls on the street or in the mall, but they do not seem interested in a conversation.
What is your experience and the best way to find a decent girl in Phnom Penh for a relationship (or even friendship) for a European guy in late 20's? (I am not interested in hookers or bar girls)
Thank's for any honest advise, please no trolling.
My insights are largely anecdotal from my discussions with Mrs Cargo, her sisters and friend's experiences. Caveat: these insights may be generalising and there are always exceptions. Apologies if I'm repeating some of the earlier members comments.
1. 'good girls' in Cambodia generally do not date in a 'western' sense aka one on one. Dating khmer style involves having the family present or as a group. No boom boom till marriage. Certainly still the case in the province albeit some city girls are becoming more free spirited and independent.
2. it is true that some khmer girls are open to a relationship with a foreigner coz khmer guy's reputation are not always the best. Many stories of marriages, the girl gets pregnant and the husband pisses off or cheats on his wife.
3. language is an issue as others have stated. Many girls are very shy to foreigners..
4. whilst some girls maybe open to a foreigner relationship they are at the same time concerned about their associated reputation ie one of coming here to have a good time and play with a girl and then dump her and go back to their home country. Traditional viewpoint.
5. many are not interested in a 'boyfriend' in a western sense. They want a husband. Again, they fear that a guy will have a girlfriend, have fun with her, get bored and then dump her. They are worried about their long term future, security and reputation.
6. they are concerned about the foreigner's longevity in Cambodia. Many are here temporarily or through circumstance return to their home country. Younger guys often find it difficult to make a decent living here and they must have a work permit to stay any decent amount of time. Older financially independent retirees don't have that issue with visas but some khmer girls are concerned about the age gap..especially as after marry, most want to have kids.
7. not all girls are necessarily open to marrying a foreigner and migrating to their husband's home country. Family ties are strong and I've found that Thais and Cambodians are lees inclined to do so than say, filipinas. Again generalising and if the girl is from a very poor family $$$ will be the key motivator.
8. quite a few of Mrs Cargo's friends have asked her: does she know any 'nice' younger barangs who are serious about a relationship/marriage and wanting a family? TBH most younger barang guys I know are here for fun and not really ready to settle down. Again, in general but you can see the conundrum..
As to suggestions:
1. one needs to demonstrate they are here for the long term and serious about their intentions.
2. learn the language if you can
3. avoid the bars and bringing hookers home to your apartment.. the the tom tom drums will soon let any prospective 'good girls' know. Reputation is everything here imo.
4. look for opportunities via your work and establish a good rapport with the local community where you live and I reckon opportunities will easily come your way..