Jakarta Hustle
Posted: Sat Jul 20, 2019 6:43 pm
The Stickman Bangkok cop story reminded me of one of my own run-ins with police in the region. Share your own if you've a mind to.
Jakarta Hustle
By Kung-fu Hillbilly
We both finished our whiskey, grabbed our cigarettes and ran laughing out of the bar and into the sticky January night, the moon veiled by the season's cloud. I grabbed at Indri and she squealed with teased delight, slapping at my inappropriate hands as she escaped me. She was gorgeous and I wanted her.
I was a naive know-it-all twenty one year old and Indri was a well rehearsed exotic beauty who had found her mark. The invitation to join her at home promised we might know each other in different ways, but little did I know this was to be her final card before she pulled the rabbit from the hat.
Mounting her motorbike that lay hidden down a small alley at the back of the bar, we started to work our way through the heavy traffic of Jakarta, me using the excuse of momentum every time we slowed to lean my chest against her back and grip the outside of her thighs with my knees. Indri would respond with a soft pat of my leg and I would try to imagine what might lay behind the remainder of the night with this Javanese beauty. My imaginings were so far removed from my reality that I would wish I had never met her. I know for certain I will never forget her.
Assuming Indri lived close to her hunting ground of Jalan Jaksa I was surprised after thirty minutes not having arrived at her apartment. I leaned close to her ear and asked when were we going to arrive, her reply "Soon. Soon" she palmed my thigh "Take you home morning". With that Indri powered the bike on, and strands of her hair licked at the sides of my face as we sped toward her den.
We veered off the main road into the side streets, winding our way into darker quarters on worsening roads until I hadn't a clue where we were or how I would get back if I was left to my own means. We finally pulled up outside a small block of rooms that were almost in complete darkness except for a single light that shone from the porch of the apartment furthest left, Indri' s home.
Dismounting her bike I looked back over my shoulder down the small street. It was vacant of life and very dark. I noticed how very quiet it was for a suburban Indonesian street - no dogs.Turning to follow Indri to her flat I saw a small laneway that ran alongside her room ending at a brick wall. Indri called to me so as to hurry me up and I considered all may not have been what it seemed.
Her home was a simple affair. One large room sparsely furnished with a double bed, a small table and two chairs near the door, a dresser with make-up and its implements strewn across the surface, a gas stove placed on top of a small cupboard and a pantry. Warming the space with sarongs draped from windows, old family photos and tomorrow nights outfit on the wall didn't work. Other than a small attached bathroom with a squat toilet, this was her home.
We seated ourselves at the table which sat against the same wall as the door. If the front door oppened any more than half way it would hit the back of my chair. Conversation had become labored and I noticed Indri becoming less comfortable, and I worried perhaps she had changed her idea as to what the remainder of the night might hold for us both. The knock at the door gave me something much worse to worry about.
Indri jumped at the sound of our visitor. I started to jump to conclusions as to who I thought it might be banging at the door. An angry boyfriend she had forgotten to tell me about, an over protective father who had heard she was cavorting with a westerner, or perhaps corrupt police officers wanting a bribe with the very real threat of me being locked up for a few days if I didn't have enough money to pay them?
Indri opened the door and I heard the quiet controlled voice of a man. Indri never once spoke. The man's voice ceased and I felt the hand of my host on my shoulder, gently, and then the last thing I wanted to hear. "Polisi,you must go outside.
I went to the door fully understanding my predicament and fully aware of the scam Indri and her pals had working. Find a fresh young westerner and lure him with a beautiful Javanese woman to a dark and dangerous part of Jakarta, and, well, scare the fuck out of him into giving you as much money as you can.
I threw Indri a disgusted look and went to the door to be confronted with a short man in a uniform covered in various shapes and sizes of polished silver and brass . He stood with the palm of his right hand resting on the butt of his gun which was holstered at his hip. He looked at me initially with no emotion at all then with a voice much louder than the tone he used with my host, he demanded "PASSPORT!!"
He waved me outside to follow him and I saw over his shoulder four other officers leaning against a Polisi personel carrier, each of them smoking lazily, AK's cradled lightly in their arms like fragile babies. To this day I still don't know how I didn't hear them arrive. The officer turned and as he did so I heard the door to Indri's apartment close behind me. Indri had played her part perfectly, and now it was up to the polisi to extract her reward.
He read aloud the details from my passport then looked at me with an enormous smile. I wasn't sure if he wanted me to be astounded at his ability to read English, or whether it was the fact I was an Australian and it was a "good catch" that brought him such glee. I didn't respond to his self approving grin. I just stared at him. He didn't like it.
Giving the universal signal for intimate relations with his finger and fist while still holding my passport, Silver and Brass burst into a rage about western men and Indonesian women being engaged in that type of behaviour. How it was "against the law" and I could expect to spend "long time" in an "bad Indonesian jail", which was going to be much worse than anything I could imagine.Throwing my document to the ground Silver and Brass screwed it into the muddy soil with his shiny boot. After disfiguring my passport he told me to pick it up, all the while making sure when I bent over his shiny boot didn't move an inch keeping it close to my face, lending doubt he could kick me to heaven if he wanted to as easily as he could fart. All I could think was I wanted to kick Silver and Brass in the nuts.
Putting his hand in the small of my back this horrible little man pushed me toward the alley. I looked again to the other Polisi, they now following as we headed into the dark lane along side Indri's apartment, stopping so as to stand across in line from the building wall, blocking any way of escape, they all now grinning. I wonder if they are all bored and look forward to a late night Silver and Brass song and dance.
It played out as I expected,lots of yelling from Silver and Brass followed by feigned concern for my troubled ways. I'd had enough, withdrew my money belt, opened it to show everything including the three hundred dollars Australian I had, and handed it all over. Silver and Brass pointed toward the road telling me to leave. The others parted and I walked through out onto the lane with no idea where I was but grateful not to have to listen and see that horrible little cunt any more. I needed to find light. I neede to find the city, I needed to get out of the darkness where I was a soft target. I was more nervous walking the back streets of jakarta than being rolled by Silver and Brass.
Looking around I could see a concentration of light being reflected off the low lying cloud about eight or ten kilometres to the north, or was it south, and set off in that direction to a chorus of barking dogs - where were the dogs before? After ten minutes or so with lights flashing and sirens blaring Silver and Brass and his goons was back and pulled up along side. One of the officers jumped out of the and approached me. He told me to get in the back of the personel carrier."Fuck" I thought ,"Looks like we are off to the ATM" Then Silver and Brass leans out the window and says it isn't safe for me here, they would take me back to Jalan Jaksa. I burst out laughing, everyone else joined me . We laughed a lot on the way back to Jalan Jaksa, me and my new Polisis pals.
On Jalan Jaksa outside Margot Hotel Silver and Brass gave me a packet of cigarettes, 50 000 rupiah and a fond back slapping farewell. I went to the deli got a Bintang, sat on the kerb, lit a smoke and laughed again as they left. Fuckers.
A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.
Jakarta Hustle
By Kung-fu Hillbilly
We both finished our whiskey, grabbed our cigarettes and ran laughing out of the bar and into the sticky January night, the moon veiled by the season's cloud. I grabbed at Indri and she squealed with teased delight, slapping at my inappropriate hands as she escaped me. She was gorgeous and I wanted her.
I was a naive know-it-all twenty one year old and Indri was a well rehearsed exotic beauty who had found her mark. The invitation to join her at home promised we might know each other in different ways, but little did I know this was to be her final card before she pulled the rabbit from the hat.
Mounting her motorbike that lay hidden down a small alley at the back of the bar, we started to work our way through the heavy traffic of Jakarta, me using the excuse of momentum every time we slowed to lean my chest against her back and grip the outside of her thighs with my knees. Indri would respond with a soft pat of my leg and I would try to imagine what might lay behind the remainder of the night with this Javanese beauty. My imaginings were so far removed from my reality that I would wish I had never met her. I know for certain I will never forget her.
Assuming Indri lived close to her hunting ground of Jalan Jaksa I was surprised after thirty minutes not having arrived at her apartment. I leaned close to her ear and asked when were we going to arrive, her reply "Soon. Soon" she palmed my thigh "Take you home morning". With that Indri powered the bike on, and strands of her hair licked at the sides of my face as we sped toward her den.
We veered off the main road into the side streets, winding our way into darker quarters on worsening roads until I hadn't a clue where we were or how I would get back if I was left to my own means. We finally pulled up outside a small block of rooms that were almost in complete darkness except for a single light that shone from the porch of the apartment furthest left, Indri' s home.
Dismounting her bike I looked back over my shoulder down the small street. It was vacant of life and very dark. I noticed how very quiet it was for a suburban Indonesian street - no dogs.Turning to follow Indri to her flat I saw a small laneway that ran alongside her room ending at a brick wall. Indri called to me so as to hurry me up and I considered all may not have been what it seemed.
Her home was a simple affair. One large room sparsely furnished with a double bed, a small table and two chairs near the door, a dresser with make-up and its implements strewn across the surface, a gas stove placed on top of a small cupboard and a pantry. Warming the space with sarongs draped from windows, old family photos and tomorrow nights outfit on the wall didn't work. Other than a small attached bathroom with a squat toilet, this was her home.
We seated ourselves at the table which sat against the same wall as the door. If the front door oppened any more than half way it would hit the back of my chair. Conversation had become labored and I noticed Indri becoming less comfortable, and I worried perhaps she had changed her idea as to what the remainder of the night might hold for us both. The knock at the door gave me something much worse to worry about.
Indri jumped at the sound of our visitor. I started to jump to conclusions as to who I thought it might be banging at the door. An angry boyfriend she had forgotten to tell me about, an over protective father who had heard she was cavorting with a westerner, or perhaps corrupt police officers wanting a bribe with the very real threat of me being locked up for a few days if I didn't have enough money to pay them?
Indri opened the door and I heard the quiet controlled voice of a man. Indri never once spoke. The man's voice ceased and I felt the hand of my host on my shoulder, gently, and then the last thing I wanted to hear. "Polisi,you must go outside.
I went to the door fully understanding my predicament and fully aware of the scam Indri and her pals had working. Find a fresh young westerner and lure him with a beautiful Javanese woman to a dark and dangerous part of Jakarta, and, well, scare the fuck out of him into giving you as much money as you can.
I threw Indri a disgusted look and went to the door to be confronted with a short man in a uniform covered in various shapes and sizes of polished silver and brass . He stood with the palm of his right hand resting on the butt of his gun which was holstered at his hip. He looked at me initially with no emotion at all then with a voice much louder than the tone he used with my host, he demanded "PASSPORT!!"
He waved me outside to follow him and I saw over his shoulder four other officers leaning against a Polisi personel carrier, each of them smoking lazily, AK's cradled lightly in their arms like fragile babies. To this day I still don't know how I didn't hear them arrive. The officer turned and as he did so I heard the door to Indri's apartment close behind me. Indri had played her part perfectly, and now it was up to the polisi to extract her reward.
He read aloud the details from my passport then looked at me with an enormous smile. I wasn't sure if he wanted me to be astounded at his ability to read English, or whether it was the fact I was an Australian and it was a "good catch" that brought him such glee. I didn't respond to his self approving grin. I just stared at him. He didn't like it.
Giving the universal signal for intimate relations with his finger and fist while still holding my passport, Silver and Brass burst into a rage about western men and Indonesian women being engaged in that type of behaviour. How it was "against the law" and I could expect to spend "long time" in an "bad Indonesian jail", which was going to be much worse than anything I could imagine.Throwing my document to the ground Silver and Brass screwed it into the muddy soil with his shiny boot. After disfiguring my passport he told me to pick it up, all the while making sure when I bent over his shiny boot didn't move an inch keeping it close to my face, lending doubt he could kick me to heaven if he wanted to as easily as he could fart. All I could think was I wanted to kick Silver and Brass in the nuts.
Putting his hand in the small of my back this horrible little man pushed me toward the alley. I looked again to the other Polisi, they now following as we headed into the dark lane along side Indri's apartment, stopping so as to stand across in line from the building wall, blocking any way of escape, they all now grinning. I wonder if they are all bored and look forward to a late night Silver and Brass song and dance.
It played out as I expected,lots of yelling from Silver and Brass followed by feigned concern for my troubled ways. I'd had enough, withdrew my money belt, opened it to show everything including the three hundred dollars Australian I had, and handed it all over. Silver and Brass pointed toward the road telling me to leave. The others parted and I walked through out onto the lane with no idea where I was but grateful not to have to listen and see that horrible little cunt any more. I needed to find light. I neede to find the city, I needed to get out of the darkness where I was a soft target. I was more nervous walking the back streets of jakarta than being rolled by Silver and Brass.
Looking around I could see a concentration of light being reflected off the low lying cloud about eight or ten kilometres to the north, or was it south, and set off in that direction to a chorus of barking dogs - where were the dogs before? After ten minutes or so with lights flashing and sirens blaring Silver and Brass and his goons was back and pulled up along side. One of the officers jumped out of the and approached me. He told me to get in the back of the personel carrier."Fuck" I thought ,"Looks like we are off to the ATM" Then Silver and Brass leans out the window and says it isn't safe for me here, they would take me back to Jalan Jaksa. I burst out laughing, everyone else joined me . We laughed a lot on the way back to Jalan Jaksa, me and my new Polisis pals.
On Jalan Jaksa outside Margot Hotel Silver and Brass gave me a packet of cigarettes, 50 000 rupiah and a fond back slapping farewell. I went to the deli got a Bintang, sat on the kerb, lit a smoke and laughed again as they left. Fuckers.
A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.