Everyone's A Comedian
- General Mackevili
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Re: Everyone's A Comedian
Seriously contemplating remarrying my ex wife, but I'm pretty sure she'll figure out that I'm just after my money.
"Life is too important to take seriously."
"Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh."
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Re: Everyone's A Comedian
After a shagging session with my ex she told me i was a one man party
I was feeling pretty good about myself until she said that I'm the only one having fun
I was feeling pretty good about myself until she said that I'm the only one having fun
Re: Everyone's A Comedian
General Mackevili wrote:Seriously contemplating remarrying my ex wife, but I'm pretty sure she'll figure out that I'm just after my money.
I won't get married anymore,I just find a woman I hate and buy her a house.
Re: RE: Re: Everyone's A Comedian
didn't know cars these days needed keysEdinWigan wrote:1975
2016
- General Mackevili
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Re: Everyone's A Comedian
I used to be in rock band. Every night I'd have women screaming and banging on my door. Sometimes I'd open it and let them out.
"Life is too important to take seriously."
"Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh."
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- General Mackevili
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Re: Everyone's A Comedian
I met an older woman at a bar last night. She looked pretty good for a 50-year-old. In fact, she wasn't too bad at all, and I found myself thinking she probably had a really hot daughter. We drank a couple of beers, and she asked if I'd ever had a Sportsman's Double? 'What's that? I asked. 'It's a mother and daughter threesome,' she said. As my mind began to embrace the idea, and I wondered what her daughter might look like, I said, 'No, I haven't.' We drank a bit more, then she said with a wink, 'tonight's your lucky night'. We went back to her place. We walked in. She put on the hall light and shouted upstairs: 'Mom...you still awake?'
"Life is too important to take seriously."
"Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh."
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- Username Taken
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Re: Everyone's A Comedian
General Mackevili wrote:I met an older woman at a bar last night. She looked pretty good for a 50-year-old. In fact, she wasn't too bad at all, and I found myself thinking she probably had a really hot daughter. We drank a couple of beers, and she asked if I'd ever had a Sportsman's Double? 'What's that? I asked. 'It's a mother and daughter threesome,' she said. As my mind began to embrace the idea, and I wondered what her daughter might look like, I said, 'No, I haven't.' We drank a bit more, then she said with a wink, 'tonight's your lucky night'. We went back to her place. We walked in. She put on the hall light and shouted upstairs: 'Mom...you still awake?'
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Re: Everyone's A Comedian
Man walks into a library and says; "Have you got a book on suicide?" The librarian looks at him and says; "Fuck off, you won't bring it back."
Or if that's not your cup of tea...
Bloke walks into a bar and sees a fat girl wearing a t-shirt which says; "Man eater." He strolls up to her and says; "Excuse me love, about that t-shirt?" The woman scowls and says; "Yes, very funny how many have I eaten right?" and he shakes his head and says; "Of course not! I was just going to say that's not how you spell manatee."
Or if that's not your cup of tea...
Bloke walks into a bar and sees a fat girl wearing a t-shirt which says; "Man eater." He strolls up to her and says; "Excuse me love, about that t-shirt?" The woman scowls and says; "Yes, very funny how many have I eaten right?" and he shakes his head and says; "Of course not! I was just going to say that's not how you spell manatee."
"If you want a vision of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face - forever." - George Orwell
- General Mackevili
- The General
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- Joined: Tue May 06, 2014 5:24 pm
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Re: Everyone's A Comedian
Spent over an hour at the wife's grave this morning.
Spoiler:
"Life is too important to take seriously."
"Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh."
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"Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh."
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