I have told her she cannot live in the west as she does here. She buys most of her food prepared and rarely cooks. I could never afford to to that at home and every night (at home) before I sleep I am thinking about food planning for the next day as I make most of my own food and often eat the same thing for a few days in a row to avoid waste. She gets her nails and hair done at least once a week and maybe a facial too. Those things are cheap here but would cost $100+ all in per time where I’m from.

She seems to eat all the time and mostly fruit - all hours of the day and will sometimes spend more than she earns (in her professional job) in a day on cherries or durian because it seems a must have. Where I live an all fruit diet would cost more than an all meat diet and she would not be able to do this. It’s a big worry. I have told her and she says “I know” as if to say don’t worry but I think she will be terribly unhappy. Also I can stay in for days at a time and she runs around all day every day. My opinion is that life is just so much easier and better here than in the west but they all have a Hollywood lie in their heads. Pretty sure I know the ending if I ever took her here to live with me.

David Gordon wrote: ↑Sat Aug 27, 2022 1:38 pm Anyone with any experience bringing their Khmer lady to the west to live? How has it been integrating her? What is the hardest thing for her (and you) to deal with? Does she hang on to certain ideas, habits, notions, that are really inconvenient or has she adapted well and westernized ok?

Interested to hear some of the details and a few stories.

My wife's been in the US for about a year now, and all's well. We kind of decided there was really no way to know how anyone would like a new country or not until you actually get there, but based on others' opinions, we kind of thought she'd be fine. The fact she speaks decent English has probably been one of the biggest factors in liking it. I thought there'd be more culture shock than there was, lol. We also have a baby now, so while she might have gotten a bit bored here at times, that won't happen again.

General Mackevili wrote: ↑Sun Aug 28, 2022 9:00 am

David Gordon wrote: ↑Sat Aug 27, 2022 1:38 pm Anyone with any experience bringing their Khmer lady to the west to live? How has it been integrating her? What is the hardest thing for her (and you) to deal with? Does she hang on to certain ideas, habits, notions, that are really inconvenient or has she adapted well and westernized ok?

Interested to hear some of the details and a few stories.

My wife's been in the US for about a year now, and all's well. We kind of decided there was really no way to know how anyone would like a new country or not until you actually get there, but based on others' opinions, we kind of thought she'd be fine. The fact she speaks decent English has probably been one of the biggest factors in liking it. I thought there'd be more culture shock than there was, lol. We also have a baby now, so while she might have gotten a bit bored here at times, that won't happen again.

A mother can definitely get bored - despite being busy caring for a baby. Will you have time for boredom?

I once took my Thai wife home for 3 months, she saw snow for the first time. Lots of Thai super markets and restaurants.
But it was not for her, being parted from the family and her original surroundings was the turning point

Been living in the US since beginning of 2018, no issues for us here. I rented a place first and we bought a home in 2020 once we felt comfortable we could stay here long term. We live in an area close to some Asian communities so there’s numerous food stores. She has video calls with family on a regular basis. She was a dental nurse and works as a dental assistant here when the kids are in school. Didn’t take long for her to learn and love Amazon.

Independence is important, she had a car in Cambodia and got her license in the US right away. It would be bad for both of us if I needed to escort her shopping every time!

She misses those people walking around with the little snails though.

violet wrote: ↑Sun Aug 28, 2022 9:28 am

General Mackevili wrote: ↑Sun Aug 28, 2022 9:00 am

David Gordon wrote: ↑Sat Aug 27, 2022 1:38 pm Anyone with any experience bringing their Khmer lady to the west to live? How has it been integrating her? What is the hardest thing for her (and you) to deal with? Does she hang on to certain ideas, habits, notions, that are really inconvenient or has she adapted well and westernized ok?

Interested to hear some of the details and a few stories.

My wife's been in the US for about a year now, and all's well. We kind of decided there was really no way to know how anyone would like a new country or not until you actually get there, but based on others' opinions, we kind of thought she'd be fine. The fact she speaks decent English has probably been one of the biggest factors in liking it. I thought there'd be more culture shock than there was, lol. We also have a baby now, so while she might have gotten a bit bored here at times, that won't happen again.

A mother can definitely get bored - despite being busy caring for a baby. Will you have time for boredom?

Life is bored. ™

Haha, true, and honestly, it might be easier for the Khmer partner to move to the West than for the Westerner (who's been living in SE Asia for 15 years) to move back to the West.

I think a lot of it has to do with the personality of the person before the move to the West.

If she sees moving to another country as a grand lifetime adventure (like most expats living in Cambodia) and expects things to be different, then it goes better.

If she uses lots of outside services - has her home cleaned 2-4 times/week, does her nails at the salon a few times a week, hair and make up at the shop every day, gathers with her friends at the local restaurants every day, parties at her favorite clubs every night, then the transition will be difficult.

However, if she cooks and cleans, does her own make up and nails, doesn’t party every day, and speaks English, then the transition is smoother.

But she deserves a better (or equivalent) quality of life to what she had before. I want to provide everything for her so she will want for nothing, never regret she made the great leap of faith with me.

Just my thoughts.

General Mackevili wrote: ↑Sun Aug 28, 2022 9:00 am

David Gordon wrote: ↑Sat Aug 27, 2022 1:38 pm Anyone with any experience bringing their Khmer lady to the west to live? How has it been integrating her? What is the hardest thing for her (and you) to deal with? Does she hang on to certain ideas, habits, notions, that are really inconvenient or has she adapted well and westernized ok?

Interested to hear some of the details and a few stories.

My wife's been in the US for about a year now, and all's well. We kind of decided there was really no way to know how anyone would like a new country or not until you actually get there, but based on others' opinions, we kind of thought she'd be fine. The fact she speaks decent English has probably been one of the biggest factors in liking it. I thought there'd be more culture shock than there was, lol. We also have a baby now, so while she might have gotten a bit bored here at times, that won't happen again.

I can vouch a little about the General's experience. At least my limited interaction with his wife and his family. I met them a year or 2 when they visited Coney Island and she seemed to me to be a warm and friendly person. She seemed comfortable and was able to hold a conversation. Again, my limited experience interacting but no awkwardness or having to explain and over explain things.

I am unsure if she is in school or looking to take some sort of classes. I think being engaged would be important. Improving education. On other hand, they just had a child so that can keep someone with little downtime