My wife has asked me to go to her village in Siem Reap with her tomorrow.

Her grandfather is very sick. She believes death is imminent.

He is at his home. I asked if the family was planning to take him to a hospital, she said no, it's too late.

She has asked me to go because there will be some gathering tomorrow of other elderly people and monks in his home for praying and whatnot.

She has warned me that his house is small and simple and there will be nowhere to sit and it will be hot and this will go on for many hours.

She says it's important for me to at least make an appearance otherwise her family will think I'm rude, but I can probably duck out after an hour or two and go back to the hotel.

I should wear white or black.

Has anyone been to a gathering like this and what else can I expect?

If he passes away what are the typical funeral arrangements and when would they be and what would normally be expected of me in terms of length of time in the provinces and attendance? Should I expect to be in SR for the next week?

Wear white and if you can't sit cross legged on a floor for an hour or two your fooked

Khmers have such a healthy way of dealing with death and mourning.
What a beautiful thing, to be surrounded by your loved ones as you move from this world to the next.

Depends on the type of burial.
Cremation, burial plot (Chinese) or big structure where they burn the casket with a fan arrangement and fireworks etc.

prell98765 wrote: ↑Wed Feb 23, 2022 8:21 am My wife has asked me to go to her village in Siem Reap with her tomorrow.

Her grandfather is very sick. She believes death is imminent.

He is at his home. I asked if the family was planning to take him to a hospital, she said no, it's too late.

She has asked me to go because there will be some gathering tomorrow of other elderly people and monks in his home for praying and whatnot.

She has warned me that his house is small and simple and there will be nowhere to sit and it will be hot and this will go on for many hours.

She says it's important for me to at least make an appearance otherwise her family will think I'm rude, but I can probably duck out after an hour or two and go back to the hotel.

I should wear white or black.

Has anyone been to a gathering like this and what else can I expect?

If he passes away what are the typical funeral arrangements and when would they be and what would normally be expected of me in terms of length of time in the provinces and attendance? Should I expect to be in SR for the next week?

What a nightmare. Weddings are bad enough, but this sounds truly gruesome. I've seen pictures of such an event and as a result I would not go, sod the consequences.

Tell them you have Covid, that should get you a pass. Here, you can use this;



Take a fold-up chair and a cool box of beers if you do go.

prell98765 wrote: ↑Wed Feb 23, 2022 8:21 am My wife has asked me to go to her village in Siem Reap with her tomorrow.

Her grandfather is very sick. She believes death is...

Politely skip it, and save yourself some discomfort, wink...

Send some extra money as an apology for "not being able to attend due to preexisting conditions".

If you go and can't stand it you will be more of a disruption vs if you just skip.

Edit: if you think you can deal with it then go have a new experience, sounds intriguing just not for me.

The OP is reading way more into this than is necessary, it’ll be way more relaxed than he imagines.
There will be a bunch of relatives and most of the elders from the village and the monks, all in all there will be a fair crowd to get lost amongst.
Yes it will probably go on for some time, but you do not have to sit cross legged on the floor, rooted to the spot for the entire duration, people will be wandering in and out all the time, and it’s fairly certain there will be a table or two with chairs outside where folk will be shooting the breeze and quite possibly having a beer.
Just put in an appearance, sit for as long as you are comfortable (barangs get a pass from sitting cross legged for too long as most Khmer understand we’re not used to it) when your backside starts to stiffen up, excuse yourself to go stretch your legs, then park yourself somewhere more comfortable (such as the tables mentioned earlier) and experience the friendly curiosity from any villagers who’ve never seen a barang.
As for the funeral, for a simple village family, it’s possible the ceremony and the cremation will be carried out on the family’s land, within 48 hours of the death, if it’s a person from a family of stature in the village, and the ceremony is being carried out at the Wat, it may be a day, possibly two more (I’m not 100% sure because the couple I’ve attended have been the former)
Personally I found it all quite interesting, a huge contrast to what we know in the West.