Child Safe

Kammekor · Post by **Kammekor** » Wed Sep 26, 2018 6:30 pm

CAMBOGUY123 wrote: ↑Wed Sep 26, 2018 4:09 pm We both moved back to the village for a long time, but I left to find work. One day my bike broke down and I had no money left to repair it. I was working at a pub on the night shift for money to repair it. I worked for this Indian/Cambodian guy for 30 days (every day) 16 hours a shift. I didn't miss a day, but I had no way to get back to her. He offered me 160$ for the month and I lived there. I was desperate for cash, but after the month ended he paid me 30$.

I was at the end of my rope. Almost literally.

I then got a call out of the blue from a school which I applied to months before. I pushed my motorcycle 18 kilometers back to the village with my 30$ because I knew I would get the best deal there on repairs. I got the job, but had to wait another month for my salary. I love it. I am a great teacher. I love Cambodia, I love teaching and I love these kids. I am now doing fine. But upon my return to her, in those two months, she got involved in drugs. She is now totally gone in that short amount of time.

I have tried moving her back in, but its the same story every time. She stays for 3 days, detoxes and goes nuts. Then out come the knives, threats and attacks. When hitting me yielded no results, she hit the baby to get at me. I can't focus on her anymore. It's about saving my son now. Many people said to just go back to the states, but I stayed. It hasn't been easy but I am doing the best I can.

As for the comment about camping out and forgetting about the job... what would I do for money when it was gone? Where would I live? Under a bridge? How would I buy him food? It's easy to sit in front of a computer, detached from this reality, spouting out illogical comments I suppose. Believe me, I would love to run in there and just take him and put down everyone that tried to stop me. I could. After 14 years in the military and multiple combat tours I could do it. But what would it get me? Prison, and then he's back to her. What would that accomplish?

Don't want to be a pain in the ass, but assuming you get the kid, how are you going to take care of the kid if you're working long hours and are flat broke? It seems you're a very nasty catch-22.

Barang chgout · Post by **Barang chgout** » Wed Sep 26, 2018 7:39 pm

Kammekor wrote:
CAMBOGUY123 wrote: ↑Wed Sep 26, 2018 4:09 pm We both moved back to the village for a long time, but I left to find work. One day my bike broke down and I had no money left to repair it. I was working at a pub on the night shift for money to repair it. I worked for this Indian/Cambodian guy for 30 days (every day) 16 hours a shift. I didn't miss a day, but I had no way to get back to her. He offered me 160$ for the month and I lived there. I was desperate for cash, but after the month ended he paid me 30$.

I was at the end of my rope. Almost literally.

I then got a call out of the blue from a school which I applied to months before. I pushed my motorcycle 18 kilometers back to the village with my 30$ because I knew I would get the best deal there on repairs. I got the job, but had to wait another month for my salary. I love it. I am a great teacher. I love Cambodia, I love teaching and I love these kids. I am now doing fine. But upon my return to her, in those two months, she got involved in drugs. She is now totally gone in that short amount of time.

I have tried moving her back in, but its the same story every time. She stays for 3 days, detoxes and goes nuts. Then out come the knives, threats and attacks. When hitting me yielded no results, she hit the baby to get at me. I can't focus on her anymore. It's about saving my son now. Many people said to just go back to the states, but I stayed. It hasn't been easy but I am doing the best I can.

As for the comment about camping out and forgetting about the job... what would I do for money when it was gone? Where would I live? Under a bridge? How would I buy him food? It's easy to sit in front of a computer, detached from this reality, spouting out illogical comments I suppose. Believe me, I would love to run in there and just take him and put down everyone that tried to stop me. I could. After 14 years in the military and multiple combat tours I could do it. But what would it get me? Prison, and then he's back to her. What would that accomplish?
Don't want to be a pain in the ass, but assuming you get the kid, how are you going to take care of the kid if you're working long hours and are flat broke? It seems you're a very nasty catch-22.

How many people end up dead broke in KOW? And why?

Sent from my SM-G570Y using Tapatalk

CAMBOGUY123 · Post by **CAMBOGUY123** » Wed Sep 26, 2018 7:57 pm

430 went well. They had interviewed her the day prior which I didn't know about. Police, 2 Khmer ladies, child safe guy, other official looking types. Videos pictures etc.
All in all I was very impressed. Honestly. They took my complaints seriously and acted. Very professional. They have involved Dept of Child Services who hold the power to decide who gets the child: me, her or an NGO. fearing the worst but trying to remain positive.

We all go back tomorrow, they are helping me with birth cert and registration etc and have agreed to drug test her.

I make 1000 per month. Rent is 70, electric 10, nanny 150?, food and misc 300... Yeah it sucks. I work 6 hrs per day Mon-Fri.

I ended up here broke because I refused to leave my only child to a poor Cambodian girl (then pregnant girlfriend). I ran out of cash and couldn't find work.

I came here as a tourist trying to escape winter. I wanted sun and cheap hotels that was it.

WTF.. Anyone have a time machine?

epidemiks · Post by **epidemiks** » Wed Sep 26, 2018 8:47 pm

Kammekor wrote:
CAMBOGUY123 wrote: ↑Wed Sep 26, 2018 4:09 pm We both moved back to the village for a long time, but I left to find work. One day my bike broke down and I had no money left to repair it. I was working at a pub on the night shift for money to repair it. I worked for this Indian/Cambodian guy for 30 days (every day) 16 hours a shift. I didn't miss a day, but I had no way to get back to her. He offered me 160$ for the month and I lived there. I was desperate for cash, but after the month ended he paid me 30$.

I was at the end of my rope. Almost literally.

I then got a call out of the blue from a school which I applied to months before. I pushed my motorcycle 18 kilometers back to the village with my 30$ because I knew I would get the best deal there on repairs. I got the job, but had to wait another month for my salary. I love it. I am a great teacher. I love Cambodia, I love teaching and I love these kids. I am now doing fine. But upon my return to her, in those two months, she got involved in drugs. She is now totally gone in that short amount of time.

I have tried moving her back in, but its the same story every time. She stays for 3 days, detoxes and goes nuts. Then out come the knives, threats and attacks. When hitting me yielded no results, she hit the baby to get at me. I can't focus on her anymore. It's about saving my son now. Many people said to just go back to the states, but I stayed. It hasn't been easy but I am doing the best I can.

As for the comment about camping out and forgetting about the job... what would I do for money when it was gone? Where would I live? Under a bridge? How would I buy him food? It's easy to sit in front of a computer, detached from this reality, spouting out illogical comments I suppose. Believe me, I would love to run in there and just take him and put down everyone that tried to stop me. I could. After 14 years in the military and multiple combat tours I could do it. But what would it get me? Prison, and then he's back to her. What would that accomplish?
Don't want to be a pain in the ass, but assuming you get the kid, how are you going to take care of the kid if you're working long hours and are flat broke? It seems you're a very nasty catch-22.

If the allegations of this kid being days away from being 'pimped out' are true, it's not a catch 22 at all, is it?

I certainly wouldn't be hanging around here a second longer than necessary if I was in op's position.

Get kid > get TF out of KoW.

phuketrichard · Post by **phuketrichard** » Wed Sep 26, 2018 8:57 pm

CAMBOGUY123 wrote: ↑Wed Sep 26, 2018 7:57 pm 430 went well. They had interviewed her the day prior which I didn't know about. Police, 2 Khmer ladies, child safe guy, other official looking types. Videos pictures etc.
All in all I was very impressed. Honestly. They took my complaints seriously and acted. Very professional. They have involved Dept of Child Services who hold the power to decide who gets the child: me, her or an NGO. fearing the worst but trying to remain positive.

We all go back tomorrow, they are helping me with birth cert and registration etc and have agreed to drug test her.

I make 1000 per month. Rent is 70, electric 10, nanny 150?, food and misc 300... Yeah it sucks. I work 6 hrs per day Mon-Fri.

I ended up here broke because I refused to leave my only child to a poor Cambodian girl (then pregnant girlfriend). I ran out of cash and couldn't find work.

I came here as a tourist trying to escape winter. I wanted sun and cheap hotels that was it.

WTF.. Anyone have a time machine?

LAST thing u want is to lose your kid to social services,( NGO can not take ur son) and they are not the ones to decide; the court has the final say

I certainly wouldn't be hanging around here a second longer than necessary if I was in op's position.

Get kid > get TF out of KoW.

Your still going to need a lawyer an court to get sole custody> Even if they give ur son to you , its all temporary as mom still has rights, (be her a junkie, whore or meth head)
Until u do that u cant get him a passport as both parents needs sign till he is 16 or so, UNLESS you have the court order.
Ask ur friends, family, whomever u know to lend u the $$
Its ur kid

Kammekor · Post by **Kammekor** » Wed Sep 26, 2018 9:24 pm

Barang chgout wrote: ↑Wed Sep 26, 2018 7:39 pm
Kammekor wrote:
CAMBOGUY123 wrote: ↑Wed Sep 26, 2018 4:09 pm We both moved back to the village for a long time, but I left to find work. One day my bike broke down and I had no money left to repair it. I was working at a pub on the night shift for money to repair it. I worked for this Indian/Cambodian guy for 30 days (every day) 16 hours a shift. I didn't miss a day, but I had no way to get back to her. He offered me 160$ for the month and I lived there. I was desperate for cash, but after the month ended he paid me 30$.

I was at the end of my rope. Almost literally.

I then got a call out of the blue from a school which I applied to months before. I pushed my motorcycle 18 kilometers back to the village with my 30$ because I knew I would get the best deal there on repairs. I got the job, but had to wait another month for my salary. I love it. I am a great teacher. I love Cambodia, I love teaching and I love these kids. I am now doing fine. But upon my return to her, in those two months, she got involved in drugs. She is now totally gone in that short amount of time.

I have tried moving her back in, but its the same story every time. She stays for 3 days, detoxes and goes nuts. Then out come the knives, threats and attacks. When hitting me yielded no results, she hit the baby to get at me. I can't focus on her anymore. It's about saving my son now. Many people said to just go back to the states, but I stayed. It hasn't been easy but I am doing the best I can.

As for the comment about camping out and forgetting about the job... what would I do for money when it was gone? Where would I live? Under a bridge? How would I buy him food? It's easy to sit in front of a computer, detached from this reality, spouting out illogical comments I suppose. Believe me, I would love to run in there and just take him and put down everyone that tried to stop me. I could. After 14 years in the military and multiple combat tours I could do it. But what would it get me? Prison, and then he's back to her. What would that accomplish?
Don't want to be a pain in the ass, but assuming you get the kid, how are you going to take care of the kid if you're working long hours and are flat broke? It seems you're a very nasty catch-22.
How many people end up dead broke in KOW? And why?

Sent from my SM-G570Y using Tapatalk

Because they work for 175 USD a month?

Hardly covers the costs of visa and work permit.

Cambodia is considered cheap by some, but in my opinion 175 USD doesn't stretch that long.

Being on 1000 USD a month is better of course, but still far from easy if you have to take care of a toddler and work six days a week. All the best in these tough days OP.

TWY · Post by **TWY** » Wed Sep 26, 2018 10:58 pm

OP,
I would suggest calling the US embassy and asking what documents are required to obtain a US passport for your child without the mother's signature (which is a requirement for the application). Simply tell them the short story - child's mother is having problems with drugs. Prior to the passport you need to obtain the report of birth abroad. Given the circumstances they likely will request a DNA test to establish paternity (which you have to pay for).

The requirements for a report of birth abroad include:
1. Your passport and Mother's passport
2. Child's birth certificate issued by Cambodia government with translations.
3. Hospital Birth Certificate with translation
4. US Citizen parent's evidence of 5 years physical presence in the US. If you've spent the majority of your life there a listing of where you've lived and schools attended likely will suffice.
5. 2 or 4 Child's picture passport style (2 X 2 inch).
6. Fee - I don't know the amount but I'm sure its on the embassy website somewhere.
7. AFFIDAVIT of SUPPORT since the child was born out of wedlock. You sign this in their presence.
8. DNA testing if required (I suspect you will be required - and it runs in the ballpark of $800+ (plus $75 nurses fee) plus you have to travel there.

When the report application is taken then they can process the application for passport. That requires the mother's signature! Plus paying a fee. Once the DNA test comes back affirmative the passport application is processed.

Once you have the passport you'll need a notarized/certified letter from the mother allowing you to travel internationally with your son for the purpose of living in the USA. Or you'll need some legal documents granting same permission.

If I read this thread correctly your a former US military member. Your an adult and can do as you wish. Here is what I'd do (I'm assuming you have no savings nor currently receive any financial military benefits):

1. Call multiple veteran's organizations and find out what financial help, if any, you can get to get you and your child back to the US.

2. Call all the people I served with and ask for a loan (and all other friends/family) - whatever they could give me. $100 or $1000 or more. I suspect it will take you about $5,000-10,000 to get all the legal documents and get back to USA if you have no cooperation from the child's mother. Keep working until this is complete.

3. Ask the child's mother and her family if they will agree to do the paperwork at US embassy to get a birth abroad report (which will likely mean DNA testing) and sign the application for US passport. I'd also ask if she would sign a permission for you to travel with your son to the US for purposes of living longer term. If not then you have to try to find a decent family lawyer here in Cambodia to work on your behalf.

4. Assuming you get back. Apply for federal jobs. Veterans get preference by law. Again, I'd call all the men and women I served with and try to get a decent job - if you got a federal job you'd get great health insurance for you and your child.

Good luck.

John Bingham · Post by **John Bingham** » Thu Sep 27, 2018 12:19 am

We both moved back to the village for a long time, but I left to find work. One day my bike broke down and I had no money left to repair it. I was working at a pub on the night shift for money to repair it. I worked for this Indian/Cambodian guy for 30 days (every day) 16 hours a shift. I didn't miss a day, but I had no way to get back to her. He offered me 160$ for the month and I lived there. I was desperate for cash, but after the month ended he paid me 30$.

I was at the end of my rope. Almost literally.

I then got a call out of the blue from a school which I applied to months before. I pushed my motorcycle 18 kilometers back to the village with my 30$ because I knew I would get the best deal there on repairs. I got the job, but had to wait another month for my salary. I love it. I am a great teacher. I love Cambodia, I love teaching and I love these kids. I am now doing fine. But upon my return to her, in those two months, she got involved in drugs. She is now totally gone in that short amount of time.

So what you're saying is that you moved to the village where you had no means of support, then ran out of cash so abandoned your misses and kid and rode off into the sunset, only to beset by travails? And then after a long and difficult journey you returned only to find the woman stricken with grief and sorrow. I hope I'm not the only person who thinks this reads like a cheap novella with the OP set as the troubled hero?

frank lee bent · Post by **frank lee bent** » Thu Sep 27, 2018 4:48 am

after the month ended he paid me 30$.

I had a couple of situations like that.
I fucked them over and got my money.
It is a good idea to develop some leverage going into these things, for your own protection.

Cam Nivag · Post by **Cam Nivag** » Thu Sep 27, 2018 5:39 am

Unethical dickheads know that people who take jobs working 16 hours a day for $150 a month don't have leverage.

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