armchairlawyer wrote: ↑Wed Sep 19, 2018 1:30 pm I'm sure you're right but (not having been through this myself) it seems to me that for the ceremony to have any meaning, both of the parties must be involved and derive genuine pleasure from it. Is there no way of adapting it so that the barang groom can genuinely feel some small part of the ceremony is special for him?

The foreign participant will be plenty involved, but there is a lot going on, you just need to go with the flow,...it will still have meaning.

Serious, serious advice.

Do NOT get involved. Just stump up the cash and gold and then get drunk. You won't have a clue what is going on, the family can have a good laugh at your expense (they will be doing that for the rest of your life anyway) and the day will go quicker.

Your new boss may glare at you but as long as you praise the mother-in-law in front of the newly acquired hundreds of relatives, you are safe. The mother-in-law is the key, make her happy by praising her at every possible occasion, especially her cooking.

Parade to the house. There was a female dog I have never seen before waiting at the entrance to the bunker.

Monkey suit was hot and stuffy, with the crotch wedgie feeling worse every minute.

Headman was giving directions in Khmer and having a blast watching me try to follow them. Actually they were all having a blast. Especially at the parts where I had to speak Khmer.

Lots of directions for picture shots. Put hand here, look there. Kiss missus. Kiss passionately. Must kiss more slowly. Must kiss smiling at camera. Looking at the other camera. Smile is too big. Smile is too small.

Presented gifts, money, rings to father.

And then came the post announcement pictures. More human mannequin time. Different poses, looks. Changing into yet another outfit. Missus was so exhausted that she was trembling. I was holding her from falling down for some of it.

And then, the reward.

6 stillborn premature doggie fetuses found near the plants in the decoration.

Next step, surviving pre wedding photos.

Already been promised 2-3 days of mannequin bliss at every conceivable location, in every conceivable position, with every conceivable itchy, stifling outfit. Come rain or shine or flood.

Any survival advice?

The memory of this torture fades in time.

I had to change suits 4 times due to stupid (to me) photo sessions in botanic parks at 35 deg and 1 million% humidity.

No way out, just hold on in there, grin and bear it. You asked for it and now you pay.

One good thing comes out of this, the family will always be nervous around you. Pecking order is well established and then you, a foreigner with no concept of face etc. comes along. They honestly have no idea of how to place you in their well ordered society.

Butter up the mother-in-law, she is the most important member of the family. You can get away with murder provided you have her on your side.

Really

Congratulations!!!!!

TOG wrote: ↑Wed Sep 19, 2018 3:29 pm

Butter up the mother-in-law, she is the most important member of the family. You can get away with murder provided you have her on your side.

He's giving sound advice!!!!

I'd say that's universal in all cultures

Post before and after sexy time so we know how long it took. You can frame those posts and give them to your future baby.

phuketrichard wrote: ↑Wed Sep 19, 2018 4:14 pm a piece of paper /wedding photos don't mean anything

... to you. They don't mean anything to you - I think you left that bit off. Obviously they mean a lot to NKOTB and his missus. Bit of a dick post on this thread, in my opinion.