luy tuk doh /groom dowry /sin sod

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phuketrichard
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Re: luy tuk doh /groom dowry /sin sod

Post by phuketrichard »

Dowry
A dowry is a transfer of parental property, gifts or money at the marriage of a daughter. Dowry contrasts with the related concepts of bride price and dower. While bride price or bride service is a payment by the groom or his family to the bride's parents, dowry is the wealth transferred from the bride's family to the groom or his family, ostensibly for the bride.
In a nation run by swine, all pigs are upward-mobile and the rest of us are fucked until we can put our acts together: not necessarily to win, but mainly to keep from losing completely. HST
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Re: luy tuk doh /groom dowry /sin sod

Post by pczz »

kocdim wrote: Sat Jan 13, 2018 8:42 pm
prahocalypse now wrote: Sat Jan 13, 2018 8:03 pm It's called a 'bride price' in English.

The word 'dowry' only refers to a payment made to the groom's family.
Ok. Whatever I need to change the title again :). Ok Thanks
Yep. Asians have in the wrong way round. In the uk , and i think most of europe, the bride paid the groom for taking her off their hands as women were considered a liability. Theyu couldn't fight :-) the uglier the girl, the more the grooms parents got paid
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Re: luy tuk doh /groom dowry /sin sod

Post by Username Taken »

kocdim wrote: Sat Jan 13, 2018 6:41 pm Actually the purpose of this question is to get general filling of the attitude of the family and the wife. I understand that the help with in the family is required. But how demanding can be the family, is there huge pressure on the groom regarding problems in the family? Also whats the attitude of the wife? Does the wife puts her husband and her kids on the first place? Can she draw a line when she thinks that her duty to help is done? Because I really want to keep the family out of problems and pressures. But I dont mind helping and honoring the duty that my wife might have towards her family.
If your wife is the eldest daughter, there will be a lot of additional 'family responsibilities and expectations' from her parents and siblings. She will be the first one called when parents or siblings have any issues (regardless of your nationality).


"Does the wife puts her husband and her kids on the first place?"

The pecking order as I see it goes:
-parents
-children
-siblings
-you (maybe) or that special aunt or uncle
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Re: luy tuk doh /groom dowry /sin sod

Post by Abc123 »

Username Taken wrote: Sat Jan 13, 2018 10:00 pm
kocdim wrote: Sat Jan 13, 2018 6:41 pm Actually the purpose of this question is to get general filling of the attitude of the family and the wife. I understand that the help with in the family is required. But how demanding can be the family, is there huge pressure on the groom regarding problems in the family? Also whats the attitude of the wife? Does the wife puts her husband and her kids on the first place? Can she draw a line when she thinks that her duty to help is done? Because I really want to keep the family out of problems and pressures. But I dont mind helping and honoring the duty that my wife might have towards her family.
If your wife is the eldest daughter, there will be a lot of additional 'family responsibilities and expectations' from her parents and siblings. She will be the first one called when parents or siblings have any issues (regardless of your nationality).


"Does the wife puts her husband and her kids on the first place?"

The pecking order as I see it goes:
-parents
-children
-siblings
-you (maybe) or that special aunt or uncle
I always thought it was the oldest surviving member that was the family patriarch or matriach. ie grandparents etc.
As to siblings, whom is more responsible, the eldest son or the eldest daughter?
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Re: luy tuk doh /groom dowry /sin sod

Post by Username Taken »

The eldest daughter takes care of her parents. Other daughters also contribute. But, the eldest has the main responsibility.
The sons take care of their in-laws.
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Re: luy tuk doh /groom dowry /sin sod

Post by pczz »

Username Taken wrote: Sat Jan 13, 2018 10:26 pm The eldest daughter takes care of her parents. Other daughters also contribute. But, the eldest has the main responsibility.
The sons take care of their in-laws.
I think this may vary quite a bit across the country in different ethnic groups and social classes. My understanding is the oldest unmarried daughter looks after the family, as the others have their own family to look after. after that comes unmarried sons. in any event the assumption is any barang in the family are rich so I think they get tapped first if the family is poor and maybe last if the family is of a higher class and do not want to be seen relying on a foreigner for charity
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Re: luy tuk doh /groom dowry /sin sod

Post by Username Taken »

Here's a post by a female Khmer poster, prahkeitouj, replying to something similar I said previously.

cambodian-culture-and-language/why-shou ... ml#p111767
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Re: luy tuk doh /groom dowry /sin sod

Post by Abc123 »

And who is the highest in the family, the eldest patriarch or the eldest matriarch? In reality is this always the same? And is it the same for the tribes other than Khmer?
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Re: luy tuk doh /groom dowry /sin sod

Post by Mr Cynical »

If she is original and there is less than a 10 year age gap follow tradition. If she is not then any money you pay is no different to buying a long term hooker.
The expats that are quoting tradition are forgetting a simple thing if tradition is such a strong thing and she has been married before then the previous husband has taken responsibility as tradition dictates.
I am sure they will justify their positions as previous husband no good and had run away, but all that does is confirm that the tradition bullshit is only brought into play when the ATM ( foreigner) turns up.
Simple question after you have paid the bride money and subsidized the family will you still have enough cash to support your parents if they need long term care or indeed any children from a previous relationship should the shit hit then fan and they are in need
Last edited by Mr Cynical on Sun Jan 14, 2018 12:27 am, edited 3 times in total.
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Re: sin sod

Post by kptic »

kocdim wrote: Sat Jan 13, 2018 3:37 pm
phuketrichard wrote: Sat Jan 13, 2018 2:22 pm lol
and dont forget u will be required to replace the dying buffalo, brothers education and dads second wife
mmm I was looking for some serious feed back from people with some experience with all this. But I have to admit it was little funny.
Oh, you thought that was a joke? :stir:
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