prahkeitouj wrote:
@ Samouth, I don't know if you only want to get answer from westerners or local too? To me, I just wonder why they seem very privacy?

Little Salary, what sort of things do westerners do that seems strange to you ? That they like to be alone sometimes ?

Different societies have different notions on privacy. There seems to be a big difference between western and Khmer ideas on private space and the need for it. This is easy to see in the different ways that living space is used for example: western houses have a lot of doors that shut and even lock inside the house. Most western children don't sleep with their parents, but may have their own bedroom as a private space where they can shut the door and be alone.

Won't rave on here, (I keep getting logged off LOL), but any ideas on why we have such different expectations of privacy ?

I think it's all down to just how we're raised. As kids we really don't have preconceived thoughts on what is normal or not and we're very trusting of what we're told, naive if you will. So when we're told something is normal, or things are just done and no one makes a big deal about it, we decide to ourselves that it's normal and that's how we operate. Then when someone goes against what we perceive as normal, we tend to feel that it's odd or strange.

The world is turnin', I hope it don't turn away, The world is turnin', I hope it don't turn away. All my pictures are fallin' from the wall where I placed them yesterday. The world is turnin', I hope it don't turn away. I need a crowd of people, but I can't face them day to day, I need a crowd of people, but I can't face them day to day. Though my problems are meaningless, that don't make them go away. I need a crowd of people, but I can't face them day to day. I went to the radio interview, but I ended up alone at the microphone, I went to the radio interview, but I ended up alone at the microphone. Now I'm livin' out here on the beach, but those seagulls are still out of reach. I went to the radio interview, but I ended up alone at the microphone. Get out of town, think I'll get out of town, Get out of town, think I'll get out of town. I head for the sticks with my bus and friends, I follow the road, though I don't know where it ends. Get out of town, get out of town, think I'll get out of town. 'Cause the world is turnin', I don't want to see it turn away.

On the Beach, Neil Young

Great song.

the Khmer people who live with me are scared for my safety when leaving me in the house alone.
the gf texts after an hour and asks if i am ok.

i never reply- which results in a hasty return home!

frank lee bent wrote:the Khmer people who live with me are scared for my safety when leaving me in the house alone.
the gf texts after an hour and asks if i am ok.

i never reply- which results in a hasty return home!

That's quite cute, but what are they scared of - crazy axe-murderers, or ghosts ? Or ghosts of axe-murderers ?
Do they let you go outside alone after dark ?

There's so much truth to AE86's statement.

Without doubt, the idea of rugged individualism and self-sufficiency were foundational concepts of our Western rearing.

Sometimes, friends from other cultures will confuse my concept of privacy with selfishness.
I showed someone a short documentary on someone I grew up admiring, Dick Proenneke,
and she called him disgusting because he “abandoned” his community. I pointed out that he helped scientists by keeping logs of wildlife and was very self-sufficient and did not hurt anyone, but she didn't see those things as priorities in someone’s life. Oh well.

She also pointed out that my habit of eating alone at times is bizarre and pathetic in Asia and that I tend to enjoy books and movies about strong individuals or loner, instead of the family. No she wasn’t a fan of Clint Eastwood westerns but she was sweet girl and gave a mean bj.

We didn’t have to agree on everything and I enjoyed talking about the differences in our perspectives. After my nightly bj, I’d just watch the Good, Bad, and the Ugly while she slept and things were just fine.

But that was a long time ago and she was not Khmer. Looking forward to learning about Cambodian ghosts and what not.

It probably has something to do with whether the society we grow up in is centred on the group or the individual.
Individualists feel less accountable to the community and therefore more comfortable when not constantly surveyed.

Sometimes, friends from other cultures will confuse my concept of privacy with selfishness.

The western idea of "following your dream" is seen as very selfish from the point of view of a collective culture; one example of this is (not)marrying who you want without taking into account the wishes of your family. For modern westerners, love is a private affair between two people, whereas in many cultures the uniting of two people is seen as the uniting of families/tribes and is too important to be left to individual desires.
Moving away from your family is another one.