intermarriage Asian and White

Have questions or resources regarding Khmer Culture? This forum is all about the Kingdom of Cambodia's culture. Khmer language, Cambodian weddings, French influence, Cambodian architecture, Cambodian politics, Khmer customs, etc? This is the place. Living in Cambodia can cause you to experience a whole new level of culture shock, so feel free to talk about all things related to the Khmer people, and their traditions. And if you want something in Khmer script translated into English, you will probably find what you need.
Samouth
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Re: intermarriage Asian and White

Post by Samouth »

MekongMouse wrote:
Samouth wrote:
StroppyChops wrote:In English,'cute' sometimes means ugly, but interesting.
I am not capable to understand that. :(
Sometimes a woman will say that a man is a man is "cute" when she thinks he's not attractive because it is not insulting, but it is also not something most men want to be considered. Most men would prefer handsome or sexy or hot, but cute is something you call a child. So if a woman calls a man cute, he knows that she probably is not interested in him, but it is technically not an insult, so he hasn't lost face.
Thank Bro for the clear explanation.
បើសិនធ្វើចេះ ចេះឲ្យគេកោត បើសិនធ្វើឆោត ឆោតឲ្យគេអាណិត។

If you know a lot, know enough to make them respect you, if you are stupid, be stupid enough so they can pity you.
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Re: intermarriage Asian and White

Post by taabarang »

Samouth wrote:Khmer
កូនកាត់ខ្លះអត់ស្អាតទេ។ កូនកាត់ភាគច្រើនដែលស្អាតគឺកូនកាត់ដែលមានម្ដាយខ្មែរ និង ឪពុកបារាំង តែបើឪពុកខ្មែរម្ដាយបារាំងវិញកូនកាត់នោះមិនសូវស្អាតទេ។
Translation
Some half blood kids are not cute. Some half blood kids that are really cute are those whose mother is Cambodian and father is white and for those whose father is Cambodian and mother is white, they are not really cute.

PS. This is not originally my idea and belief. This is completely the stereotype of Cambodian toward half blood kids.
Many will disagree with me, but I find this racist and indeed that has been the local village view toward my two children. For more precision this...One day I was talking with my mother-in-law and I mentioned that I considered them Cambodian. Her response was, "but they're not!" So, i pushed it a bit further and said, "Well, their mother is Cambodian, they were born in Cambodia, and their first language is Cambodian. So when will they be Cambodian.' Without hesitating for a millisecond sje said "Well they will have to marry a PURE Cambodian and their children will have to marry a PURE Cambodian and then their children will be Cambodian." So, it takes a few generations to expunge the evil foreign blood. Now in fairness to moms and other Cambodians, moms treats my kids just as well as she does the PURE Cambodian children of my wife's younger sister. So, the racism I see here is not the rabid kind we often witness in our home countries. I suspect that the uneducated villagers where I live have lost much through various revolutions, land grabs and corrupt government so that they are desperate to cling to and protect their racial identity. This identity is anything but pure for anyone who has read about the history of Cambodia. In fact, the khmer leu(whom Cambodians also look down on) were probably one of the earliest group to settle in Cambodia. I think when Cambodians see a mixed race couple they see a part of their culture disappear. I would suggest however that there are bigger problems in Cambodia.

I stated earlier that Cambodian racism is not violent( wth the exception with incidents involving Vietnamese and also Cham people in the Pol Pot era, however it can be obnoxious. I remember once my wife and I were walking hand in hand down the street of a big city and some idiot motodoup said in a stage whisper an insult of which I understood only "peak knia" a term of sexual intercourse that is used for animals. I took her home and strolled back to the street corner where it happened and tried to use my knuckles and feet to help him see the error of his ways. I left, went home, and when my wife saw my swollen knuckles she said, "Don't do that, just ignore it, there are too many of them and not enough of you; one day you will lose." I have followed her advice and fought the temptation many times. Frankly, if you insult me for being a foreigner I don't care, but my code of honor does not allow you the same generosity to my wife. Most Cambodians have absolutely no notion of democracy at the social level. Still, I like them except maybe when they drive.
As my old Cajun bait seller used to say, "I opes you luck.
Samouth
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Re: intermarriage Asian and White

Post by Samouth »

taabarang wrote:
Samouth wrote:Khmer
កូនកាត់ខ្លះអត់ស្អាតទេ។ កូនកាត់ភាគច្រើនដែលស្អាតគឺកូនកាត់ដែលមានម្ដាយខ្មែរ និង ឪពុកបារាំង តែបើឪពុកខ្មែរម្ដាយបារាំងវិញកូនកាត់នោះមិនសូវស្អាតទេ។
Translation
Some half blood kids are not cute. Some half blood kids that are really cute are those whose mother is Cambodian and father is white and for those whose father is Cambodian and mother is white, they are not really cute.

PS. This is not originally my idea and belief. This is completely the stereotype of Cambodian toward half blood kids.
Many will disagree with me, but I find this racist and indeed that has been the local village view toward my two children. For more precision this...One day I was talking with my mother-in-law and I mentioned that I considered them Cambodian. Her response was, "but they're not!" So, i pushed it a bit further and said, "Well, their mother is Cambodian, they were born in Cambodia, and their first language is Cambodian. So when will they be Cambodian.' Without hesitating for a millisecond sje said "Well they will have to marry a PURE Cambodian and their children will have to marry a PURE Cambodian and then their children will be Cambodian." So, it takes a few generations to expunge the evil foreign blood. Now in fairness to moms and other Cambodians, moms treats my kids just as well as she does the PURE Cambodian children of my wife's younger sister. So, the racism I see here is not the rabid kind we often witness in our home countries. I suspect that the uneducated villagers where I live have lost much through various revolutions, land grabs and corrupt government so that they are desperate to cling to and protect their racial identity. This identity is anything but pure for anyone who has read about the history of Cambodia. In fact, the khmer leu(whom Cambodians also look down on) were probably one of the earliest group to settle in Cambodia. I think when Cambodians see a mixed race couple they see a part of their culture disappear. I would suggest however that there are bigger problems in Cambodia.

I stated earlier that Cambodian racism is not violent( wth the exception with incidents involving Vietnamese and also Cham people in the Pol Pot era, however it can be obnoxious. I remember once my wife and I were walking hand in hand down the street of a big city and some idiot motodoup said in a stage whisper an insult of which I understood only "peak knia" a term of sexual intercourse that is used for animals. I took her home and strolled back to the street corner where it happened and tried to use my knuckles and feet to help him see the error of his ways. I left, went home, and when my wife saw my swollen knuckles she said, "Don't do that, just ignore it, there are too many of them and not enough of you; one day you will lose." I have followed her advice and fought the temptation many times. Frankly, if you insult me for being a foreigner I don't care, but my code of honor does not allow you the same generosity to my wife. Most Cambodians have absolutely no notion of democracy at the social level. Still, I like them except maybe when they drive.
sorry, if this offended you.
បើសិនធ្វើចេះ ចេះឲ្យគេកោត បើសិនធ្វើឆោត ឆោតឲ្យគេអាណិត។

If you know a lot, know enough to make them respect you, if you are stupid, be stupid enough so they can pity you.
taabarang
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Re: intermarriage Asian and White

Post by taabarang »

First, if you are referring to your post as the "this" that offended me, I have know about it for a long time and simply told the story to show that your pt. of view about Cambodian culture vis a vis my experience definetely coincide. If by this you mean some prawhaung kdeut dares to insult my wife you're damn right I was offended, but it happened a long time ago and time heals.

Really, the only time ignorance offends me is when it is mine.
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Re: intermarriage Asian and White

Post by CaliforniaGuy »

taabarang wrote:First, if you are referring to your post as the "this" that offended me, I have know about it for a long time and simply told the story to show that your pt. of view about Cambodian culture vis a vis my experience definetely coincide. If by this you mean some prawhaung kdeut dares to insult my wife you're damn right I was offended, but it happened a long time ago and time heals.

Really, the only time ignorance offends me is when it is mine.
As usual great insight and introspection! I will have to remember this.
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CaliforniaGuy
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Re: intermarriage Asian and White

Post by CaliforniaGuy »

taabarang wrote:
Samouth wrote:Khmer
កូនកាត់ខ្លះអត់ស្អាតទេ។ កូនកាត់ភាគច្រើនដែលស្អាតគឺកូនកាត់ដែលមានម្ដាយខ្មែរ និង ឪពុកបារាំង តែបើឪពុកខ្មែរម្ដាយបារាំងវិញកូនកាត់នោះមិនសូវស្អាតទេ។
Translation
Some half blood kids are not cute. Some half blood kids that are really cute are those whose mother is Cambodian and father is white and for those whose father is Cambodian and mother is white, they are not really cute.

PS. This is not originally my idea and belief. This is completely the stereotype of Cambodian toward half blood kids.
Many will disagree with me, but I find this racist and indeed that has been the local village view toward my two children. For more precision this...One day I was talking with my mother-in-law and I mentioned that I considered them Cambodian. Her response was, "but they're not!" So, i pushed it a bit further and said, "Well, their mother is Cambodian, they were born in Cambodia, and their first language is Cambodian. So when will they be Cambodian.' Without hesitating for a millisecond sje said "Well they will have to marry a PURE Cambodian and their children will have to marry a PURE Cambodian and then their children will be Cambodian." So, it takes a few generations to expunge the evil foreign blood. Now in fairness to moms and other Cambodians, moms treats my kids just as well as she does the PURE Cambodian children of my wife's younger sister. So, the racism I see here is not the rabid kind we often witness in our home countries. I suspect that the uneducated villagers where I live have lost much through various revolutions, land grabs and corrupt government so that they are desperate to cling to and protect their racial identity. This identity is anything but pure for anyone who has read about the history of Cambodia. In fact, the khmer leu(whom Cambodians also look down on) were probably one of the earliest group to settle in Cambodia. I think when Cambodians see a mixed race couple they see a part of their culture disappear. I would suggest however that there are bigger problems in Cambodia.

I stated earlier that Cambodian racism is not violent( wth the exception with incidents involving Vietnamese and also Cham people in the Pol Pot era, however it can be obnoxious. I remember once my wife and I were walking hand in hand down the street of a big city and some idiot motodoup said in a stage whisper an insult of which I understood only "peak knia" a term of sexual intercourse that is used for animals. I took her home and strolled back to the street corner where it happened and tried to use my knuckles and feet to help him see the error of his ways. I left, went home, and when my wife saw my swollen knuckles she said, "Don't do that, just ignore it, there are too many of them and not enough of you; one day you will lose." I have followed her advice and fought the temptation many times. Frankly, if you insult me for being a foreigner I don't care, but my code of honor does not allow you the same generosity to my wife. Most Cambodians have absolutely no notion of democracy at the social level. Still, I like them except maybe when they drive.
Thanks for your interesting and personal insight into Cambodian culture. Sorry your kids have to endure this, but maybe they will be better off because of it. I have always thought it is better to be a bit "odd" than to be mainstream. It forces one to be more creative and fosters greater ability to handle difficulties.

My wife is Khmer and I am an American WASP, we don't have children yet, but her family always asks us when we will have a baby. I get a bit of a different feeling from them. They always tell us our children will be very beautiful (maybe because they will be more white). But her parents are urban more than rural, although they grew up in the provinces. On her mothers side there is also some Chinese and a little Vietnamese and French, the father side, pure Khmer (whatever that is), so that they are "mixed" may explain some of the difference in attitude.

You are probably right that they feel part of their culture will disappear when the "races" mix. That seems to occur to less educated peoples everywhere in the world, the U.S. and Europe included. Many small countries in Europe, such as Hungary see their language and culture disappearing, lost in a mix of the changing western world culture, and there is certainly repressed racism and fear of change in the U.S., especially in the less affluent and rural areas. Change happens, and it scares a lot of people, especially when they feel they don't have the options to deal with it.

Glad to hear that you have given up trying to fight all of the fools that insult you. And great insight from your wife "Don't do that, just ignore it, there are too many of them and not enough of you; one day you will lose." Not enough of you! Great quote! I am reminded of a saying attributed to Mark Twain: “Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.” I do try to follow this myself, although I often fail.
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Re: intermarriage Asian and White

Post by frank lee bent »

a knuckle sandwich is good
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Re: intermarriage Asian and White

Post by Mr Curious »

frank lee bent wrote:try telling that to a kampong cham girl mr curious
I have on many occasions. I stay at a dorm compound with maybe 30 students there. Which is why I say it's more an issue with THEM. I mean even the statues at buddhist sites are painted white(pink) fleshtones. I pointed this out and asked them why they have barang statues in the park :P
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