Methods we can use to avoid quarells and resolve issues
- Jerry Atrick
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Re: Methods we can use to avoid quarells and resolve issues
Kammekor wrote: ↑Tue Jun 22, 2021 4:33 pmOf course ignoring our culture, or their culture, is impossible. You have to find some common ground, acceptable for both, before making commitments. IMHO most Khmer girls are pretty realistic about this if you can communicate with them beyond 'I love you long time' and 'me angry boxing you'.Big Daikon wrote: ↑Tue Jun 22, 2021 4:24 pmThis sounds nice on paper, but doesn't seem like a realistic option. Our cultural backgrounds are such a huge part of our individual identities.
IMHO it's not so much a cultural barrier, but a language barrier.
True enough, rural Khmer girls are rather similar to rural girls where I'm from, just better looking by a factor of 60000
Re: Methods we can use to avoid quarells and resolve issues
You tink too mutt
- Big Daikon
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Re: Methods we can use to avoid quarells and resolve issues
I found culture to be stronger than lamguage in my experience with Japanese women.Kammekor wrote: ↑Tue Jun 22, 2021 4:33 pmOf course ignoring our culture, or their culture, is impossible. You have to find some common ground, acceptable for both, before making commitments. IMHO most Khmer girls are pretty realistic about this if you can communicate with them beyond 'I love you long time' and 'me angry boxing you'.Big Daikon wrote: ↑Tue Jun 22, 2021 4:24 pmThis sounds nice on paper, but doesn't seem like a realistic option. Our cultural backgrounds are such a huge part of our individual identities.
IMHO it's not so much a cultural barrier, but a language barrier.
I agree with the common ground point. Communication and compromise are good for any relationship.
(Digging all the advice here.)
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Re: Methods we can use to avoid quarells and resolve issues
@violet You added several self correction tactics. I believe too that a person should recognise when they make errors and bad judgements and then correct all the bad aspects of their personality.violet wrote: ↑Tue Jun 22, 2021 2:59 am * spend some time reflecting on how you may have contributed to or instigated the aggressive behaviour
* listen, discuss and seek resolution prior to aggressive behaviour
* consider that a raised voice is not aggression, but rather frustration
* stop considering the female has the problem while being blind to the problematic behaviour you may have that comes before her frustration
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Re: Methods we can use to avoid quarells and resolve issues
armchairlawyer wrote: ↑Tue Jun 22, 2021 7:01 am
What sustains a marriage isn’t regular, terrific sex, it is honouring bids for attention. What I mean by this is that when one of you makes a remark (it need not be about sex, it could be as mundane as a comment about the cat), or otherwise seems to be asking for a response, that reaching out – the bid – is responded to, or, in other words, honoured.
Another indicator of a good marriage is loving touch – which isn’t necessarily sexual touch. Feeling relaxed with each other means you can share thoughts and feelings. Not feeling competitive with each other too often and not getting into a frequent scramble for the moral high ground also helps to make.......
IMHO, this is spot on. Respective ages, social backgrounds, bar girl provenance, linguistic ability - these don't matter a bean if you follow this advice.
@armchairlawyer I agree. Attention such as answering your wife with a thoughtful response to show you're listening and interested and not just acknowledgeing her with a grunt or ignoring her. Also affection - when you walk into the room touch her shoulder, rub her back, if you want to ask her something stand beside her and look into her eyes. Smile, then ask. When (she is or you are) trying on a dress in the mirror, make eye contact again and then gently hug her. She should be affectionate too, if you let her. Share light feelings with touch and concerns and thoughts with tact.
I'd correct that last sentence of yours, that several things don't matter a bean if you DON'T follow this advice. At least to me that makes more sense now.
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Re: Methods we can use to avoid quarells and resolve issues
@Jerry Atrick Yes, agree. Uhm, which previous thread of mine was far better and wholesome in your opinion?Jerry Atrick wrote: ↑Tue Jun 22, 2021 3:54 pm This thread is wack
Particularly the OP; your previous thread was far better and wholesome, pal
@everyone. It's fair to say that my original post on this one is exaggerated. Also I was pretty vague. I included some hard opinions which weren't necessarily my true opinions in the hope of generating a variety of informative responses. I wasn't disappointed so thanks everyone.
- Jerry Atrick
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Re: Methods we can use to avoid quarells and resolve issues
I believe it was some musings on how you met your partnerPhnom Penh Pal wrote: ↑Tue Jun 22, 2021 8:01 pm@Jerry Atrick Yes, agree. Uhm, which previous thread of mine was far better and wholesome in your opinion?Jerry Atrick wrote: ↑Tue Jun 22, 2021 3:54 pm This thread is wack
Particularly the OP; your previous thread was far better and wholesome, pal
@everyone. It's fair to say that my original post on this one is exaggerated. Also I was pretty vague. I included some hard opinions which weren't necessarily my true opinions in the hope of generating a variety of informative responses. I wasn't disappointed so thanks everyone.
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Re: Methods we can use to avoid quarells and resolve issues
@Jerry Atrick .
There was this one prior to meeting her in in 2013
cambodian-culture-and-language/opportun ... 45175.html and one when she followed me to cambodian-culture-and-language/what-wou ... 45177.html I may write more new posts. I have a few about girls I met whilst travelling in my 20's and 30's.
There was this one prior to meeting her in in 2013
cambodian-culture-and-language/opportun ... 45175.html and one when she followed me to cambodian-culture-and-language/what-wou ... 45177.html I may write more new posts. I have a few about girls I met whilst travelling in my 20's and 30's.
- pissontheroof
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