Military Officer Shoots His 16yo Wife and Then Himself

xandreu · Post by **xandreu** » Tue Feb 05, 2019 11:21 pm

explorer wrote: ↑Tue Feb 05, 2019 10:57 pm
xandreu wrote: ↑Tue Feb 05, 2019 10:26 pm There are many, many cultures/religions around the world where it's usual/typical for a girl to be married off at at 16. Clearly, for those of us with modern, western attitudes, this is clearly wrong, and an utter, devastating violation of the girls human rights, but we're not living in the western world out here. This goes on in many non-modern-Westernised countries. Muslim ones spring to mind.

I often wonder if they know deep down that it's wrong. Despite their laws/culture allowing it, do they know, deep down, in their heart, that it's wrong?

A bit like the soldiers who were ordered to gas the Jews in Auschwitz. You could argue that they were just following orders, but they must have known, deep down, that what they were doing was pure evil.
Is it wrong?

I believe girls can legally marry at 16 in Australia. If it was wrong, it would not be legal in Australia. Not many do get married at 16 now, but 100 years ago it was not uncommon. People are getting married when they are older now because they spend more years getting an education. Many people also dont rush into marriage because of the high divorce rates.

Historically in Cambodian villages there was less education, and people got married younger. Many people in Cambodian villages still dont get a good education, and still think it is OK to get married young.

Dont confuse getting married at 16, with girls being forced into marriage against their will. If a girl loves the boy, and wants to get married at 16, is that wrong? Particularly if she comes from a poor family, and has no chance of staying in school for a long time.

In Australia and other western countries you have the opposite problem. Many women want to start having children around 40, or even older. Some use IVF in an attempt to have children. Some may argue it is wrong to starting to have children when the mother is older.

Is it wrong? You're God Damn Fucking Right it's wrong.

Girls can legally marry at 16 in the UK (I believe) with their parents consent, but it rarely happens and I'm certian that social services would have a very big influence on what's going on if such a thing were to occur. And rightly so.

Just because something was common 100 years ago, doesn't make it right. The world has moved on. Womens rights being one of them.

There can only ever be one of two scenarios where a girl (NOT woman) gets married at 16. One is forced marriage, and the other is sheer nievety. Neither constitutes the basis for a long and healthy marriage. One means you're forcing a girl into a life she doesn't want, which will probably involve abuse, either sexual, physical, emotional, or all three, and the other is simply down to a choice she believes she's making by herself but is clearly too immature to make such a decision.

An adult, in most western societies, is 18. Not 16. Just because a law allows a girl (NOT woman) to marry at 16, doesn't make it right. If she really loves the guy, where's the harm in letting her wait a couple of years?

Marriage at 16, in this modern age, is simply wrong, and I'll argue you to the hilt if you really believe it isn't.

Do you have a daughter?

explorer · Post by **explorer** » Tue Feb 05, 2019 11:38 pm

One of the girls I met is studying year 12. I think she will be 18 when she finishes year 12. I told her, if she passes year 12, I will ask some friends if they will give her a job, so she can go to university and work part time. I also told her, I dont know for sure if they will give her a job, so she can also look for other jobs herself, and go to university.

I asked what she would do if she fails year 12. A friend of hers said she would get married.

Many girls who dont go to university, get married soon after finishing year 12.

I met another girl who was 14 last time I saw her a few months ago. Her mother died when she was about 5 years old. Her father left her with her aunt, got married to a new wife, went away and never came back. He has visited other friends who live near by, and the aunt has taken her to meet her father while he was visiting these friends, but he has never been to visit his daughter at home. These people are very poor. Neighbors have given her food, and clothes their children have grown out of. I have done little things for her, such as buy her a bicycle. This is one girl I really feel for. She doesnt have a mother, and her father doesnt love her. I would like to help her to go to university when the time comes. However, someone from that town told me she is engaged already. So she will probably be married before she ever has a chance to go to university.

I cant tell the aunt what to do.

If she finishes year 12, she may fail it anyway, and not go to university.

I hope she does finish year 12, and pass, without getting married. Then I will encourage her to go to university, and assist her.

A big problem is the poverty. Poor people dont have a choice.

For those who haven't experienced it. If you learn Khmer, and support schools in poor areas, you will see a lot of what goes on.

explorer · Post by **explorer** » Tue Feb 05, 2019 11:40 pm

Many Cambodian girls who get married at 16 have a happy marriage and a happy life.

I think the real issue is to help them spend more years getting an education, which will naturally result in them being older when they get married. The challenge is poverty.

andy1 · Post by **andy1** » Wed Feb 06, 2019 8:14 am

xandreu wrote: ↑Tue Feb 05, 2019 11:21 pm
explorer wrote: ↑Tue Feb 05, 2019 10:57 pm
xandreu wrote: ↑Tue Feb 05, 2019 10:26 pm There are many, many cultures/religions around the world where it's usual/typical for a girl to be married off at at 16. Clearly, for those of us with modern, western attitudes, this is clearly wrong, and an utter, devastating violation of the girls human rights, but we're not living in the western world out here. This goes on in many non-modern-Westernised countries. Muslim ones spring to mind.

I often wonder if they know deep down that it's wrong. Despite their laws/culture allowing it, do they know, deep down, in their heart, that it's wrong?

A bit like the soldiers who were ordered to gas the Jews in Auschwitz. You could argue that they were just following orders, but they must have known, deep down, that what they were doing was pure evil.
Is it wrong?

I believe girls can legally marry at 16 in Australia. If it was wrong, it would not be legal in Australia. Not many do get married at 16 now, but 100 years ago it was not uncommon. People are getting married when they are older now because they spend more years getting an education. Many people also dont rush into marriage because of the high divorce rates.

Historically in Cambodian villages there was less education, and people got married younger. Many people in Cambodian villages still dont get a good education, and still think it is OK to get married young.

Dont confuse getting married at 16, with girls being forced into marriage against their will. If a girl loves the boy, and wants to get married at 16, is that wrong? Particularly if she comes from a poor family, and has no chance of staying in school for a long time.

In Australia and other western countries you have the opposite problem. Many women want to start having children around 40, or even older. Some use IVF in an attempt to have children. Some may argue it is wrong to starting to have children when the mother is older.
Is it wrong? You're God Damn Fucking Right it's wrong.

Girls can legally marry at 16 in the UK (I believe) with their parents consent, but it rarely happens and I'm certian that social services would have a very big influence on what's going on if such a thing were to occur. And rightly so.

Just because something was common 100 years ago, doesn't make it right. The world has moved on. Womens rights being one of them.

There can only ever be one of two scenarios where a girl (NOT woman) gets married at 16. One is forced marriage, and the other is sheer nievety. Neither constitutes the basis for a long and healthy marriage. One means you're forcing a girl into a life she doesn't want, which will probably involve abuse, either sexual, physical, emotional, or all three, and the other is simply down to a choice she believes she's making by herself but is clearly too immature to make such a decision.

An adult, in most western societies, is 18. Not 16. Just because a law allows a girl (NOT woman) to marry at 16, doesn't make it right. If she really loves the guy, where's the harm in letting her wait a couple of years?

Marriage at 16, in this modern age, is simply wrong, and I'll argue you to the hilt if you really believe it isn't.

Do you have a daughter?

No but i have a sister who was 15 when she became pregnant by my best friend and married him at 16.I thought to myself this will end in tears as many others did as well.They were happily married for 30 years and raised 2 lovely daughters until his Death(due to an unfortunate accident) she still mourns him.So from my point of view marriage at a young age can and does work.

Anchor Moy · Post by **Anchor Moy** » Wed Feb 06, 2019 8:29 am

Felgerkarb wrote: ↑Tue Feb 05, 2019 10:00 pm This story is all over the place...married 5 days...married a year....no kids...she has three kids (at 16 y.o.?!!)...

I have seen about 6 versions of this story in Khmer and English.

There are different versions of the story, but what stands up is that the girl was very young (16), and her husband shot her out of jealousy, real or imagined. Does the rest matter ? Another fool with a gun shot his wife because she wants to leave him and he couldn't deal with it.
Listen up guys, threatening your wife with a gun will not make her stay, and shooting your wife will not make her love you.

CEOCambodiaNews · Post by **CEOCambodiaNews** » Wed Feb 06, 2019 12:15 pm

The story has gone international. As reported by Nigerian news:

Cambodian soldier kills teenage wife, self for requesting for divorce
Tuesday, February 5, 2019 11:13 am
A Cambodian military officer killed himself after shooting dead his 16-year-old wife with an AK-47 rifle after he allegedly refused her request for a divorce, local media reported on Tuesday.

“Second Lt. Vong Tol, 32, shot his wife, Uy Sokhom, in the chest in their home in the northern province of Preah Vihear on Sunday before shooting himself in the head.

“He was angry with the wife for wanting to divorce him,” Capt. Chuon Narong, a district penal police officer, told the Times.

Narong said neighbours had heard the couple arguing earlier Sunday, with Tol reportedly accusing his wife of having an affair, which she denied.

“The neighbours did not intervene because they regularly heard the pair fighting.

“The couple was married for about a year and did not have children,” Narong added.

Tol worked on the provincial military base and his wife was a farmer in the area.

Cambodia’s legal minimum age of marriage is 18 years old; however, children who are no less than 16 may legally marry with permission from a parent or guardian.

According to 2014 figures, the most recent data available from the United Nations’ child rights agency (UNICEF), almost one in five women in Cambodia aged 20 to 24 years old were first married or in a union before age 18.
https://www.pmnewsnigeria.com/2019/02/0 ... r-divorce/

Kammekor · Post by **Kammekor** » Wed Feb 06, 2019 12:42 pm

explorer wrote: ↑Tue Feb 05, 2019 11:40 pm Many Cambodian girls who get married at 16 have a happy marriage and a happy life.

I think the real issue is to help them spend more years getting an education, which will naturally result in them being older when they get married. The challenge is poverty.

Village life is brutal, and those girls getting married at 16 will have their first divorce at 20 after four years of domestic violence. It's not like 99% of the kids getting married at 16 will live a happy life together.

But there won't be a divorce technically because the marriage was never an official marriage. That's why you don't see this stuff in the statistics. Official divorce rate is very low.

explorer · Post by **explorer** » Wed Feb 06, 2019 1:03 pm

Kammekor wrote: ↑Wed Feb 06, 2019 12:42 pm Village life is brutal, and those girls getting married at 16 will have their first divorce at 20 after four years of domestic violence. It's not like 99% of the kids getting married at 16 will live a happy life together.

It is also not like 99% of girls getting married at 16 will experience domestic violence and get divorced.

Felgerkarb · Post by **Felgerkarb** » Wed Feb 06, 2019 1:39 pm

Anchor Moy wrote: ↑Wed Feb 06, 2019 8:29 am
Felgerkarb wrote: ↑Tue Feb 05, 2019 10:00 pm This story is all over the place...married 5 days...married a year....no kids...she has three kids (at 16 y.o.?!!)...

I have seen about 6 versions of this story in Khmer and English.
There are different versions of the story, but what stands up is that the girl was very young (16), and her husband shot her out of jealousy, real or imagined. Does the rest matter ? Another fool with a gun shot his wife because she wants to leave him and he couldn't deal with it.
Listen up guys, threatening your wife with a gun will not make her stay, and shooting your wife will not make her love you.

It matters to me based purely on principle. Basic facts are important to any story. The local press can't seem to get details correct on any sensational story. Other factors that matter in this story besides the murder are the circumstances that led up to the point of murder...those can be investigated and possibly avoided in future if the details are known are reported correctly.

Post by **Freightdog** » Wed Feb 06, 2019 3:01 pm

Felgerkarb wrote: ↑Wed Feb 06, 2019 1:39 pm It matters to me based purely on principle. Basic facts are important to any story. The local press can't seem to get details correct on any sensational story. Other factors that matter in this story besides the murder are the circumstances that led up to the point of murder...those can be investigated and possibly avoided in future if the details are known are reported correctly.

Out of respect for the victim, it matters a lot, too.

Now, I’m sure there are those who will say that it no longer matters, as she’s dead. Except that’s; this is a country where spirits of ancestors, family etc are still somewhat respected, if not revered.
The bits that I quoted above are so similar that I might be able to draw the conclusion that instead of investigating and reporting, the reporter simply copy/pasted and sensationalised for all the wrong reasons.

As for the debate about the rights and wrongs of marriage and ages of consent, etc. It’s worth noting that a very large proportion of the world population is from countries where basic human rights as a whole are not respected on a standard set by western sensibilities. So while it may be distasteful to many westerners, our own thoughts on the matter may actually be in the minority.
In Europe alone, the age of sexual consent was hardly harmonised. So expressing opinions about another environments altogether is bordering on pointless.
Social awareness and changing values often require a huge amount of effort over time to implement rules that protect specific groups.

Thinking of one particular country, which is ostensibly a secular state. The age of sexual consent is 14. The legal marriage age is 18 (for individual choice) for girls, but this seemingly can be disregarded in the event that family/imams choose otherwise, confirming a girls availability for marriage before she’s even reached double figures, let alone teenage years.
I wholeheartedly believe this is wrong. But I’m acutely aware that my education is from a completely different culture, and so my sensibilities are seen as ‘bizarre’ by the very same people whom we criticize for their own practices.

But this is digressing, somewhat.
Two people who arguable were not quite mature enough for the situations they were in are now dead.
One, a young girl. The other, an ‘officer’ in the military. Clearly, that’s tragic, with a lot of opportunities missed to avoid it happening.

Military Officer Shoots His 16yo Wife and Then Himself

Re: Military Officer Shoots His 16yo Wife and Then Himself

Re: Military Officer Shoots His 16yo Wife and Then Himself

Re: Military Officer Shoots His 16yo Wife and Then Himself

Re: Military Officer Shoots His 16yo Wife and Then Himself

Re: Military Officer Shoots His 16yo Wife and Then Himself

Re: Military Officer Shoots His 16yo Wife and Then Himself

Re: Military Officer Shoots His 16yo Wife and Then Himself

Re: Military Officer Shoots His 16yo Wife and Then Himself

Re: Military Officer Shoots His 16yo Wife and Then Himself

Re: Military Officer Shoots His 16yo Wife and Then Himself

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