Missus keeps getting told that any husband that isn’t living with their wife everyday should be encouraged to have a couple of other wives when away. And that she should have a couple of husbands (usually Khmer men that are married with a couple of kids) as well when I’m away.
Our relationship is viewed as strange by the Khmer. Strange that this isn’t going to happen. Or as missus says, it’s beyond love.
Is this just all smoke?
One Cambodian girl was telling me had a foreign boyfriend, and he told her in 6 months he will come back and give her an ATM card, so he can easily send her money. She then said, she wanted to find another boyfriend, to get more money.
One girl had a foreign boyfriend send her money to get a passport and apply for a visa so she could go there. She was living with another foreigner.
Some will get a new husband if they meet someone with more money.
Cambodians often tell people what they want to hear, instead of the truth, so people make guesses about what is the real truth. You meet some Cambodian wives whose husband works away, who are not sure if the relationship is over.
I know of a couple where he went to his home country to work and save some more money. She was not sure if he was breaking up, but didn't want to say. So she spent time with other men. When he came back and found out, he was angry and they did break up.
You will meet Cambodian wives whose husband doesn't always come home. She can think he has another girl, but is not sure.
One girl got married, and her husband went to work in Korea. He sent money to his mother but not his wife. To her the marriage was over.
Many men have more than one girlfriend.
Some others have seen unfaithful wives or girlfriends. A lot of them will tell you straight out.
They feel underappreciated, neglected, or ignored.
They crave intimacy.
They are overwhelmed by the needs of others.
They are lonely.
They expect too much from a primary relationship.
They are responding to or re-enacting early-life trauma and abuse.
They’re not having enough satisfying sex at home.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog ... omen-cheat
The likelihood of cheating increases if there is a power imbalance in the relationship. A woman who is kept on an allowance and does not financially contribute to a relationship is more likely to cheat on her spouse than one who is his financial equal. While this seems counter-intuitive, after all the man is giving her all her needs, it happens because of it. It is empowering, she is no longer dependant on the husband.
Other factors that will increase the likelihood of her having affairs are large age gaps, educational differences, cultural differences and of course if you are not there. All the love in the world is not comforting when he is twice her age, 15,000 km away and doesn t understand the nuances of her culture. Samnang is available, speaks the language and makes her feel superior whilst Johnny is far away, makes her speak English and demands she educate herself so she can be the perfect American housewife.
Add in the cultural acceptance of 2nd wives and married women having boyfriends as they do in KOW and Thailand and it is a given that infidelity will occur.
A judgement call for sure, but the perfect American housewife that grew up in America has years of experience of the western way of life and speaks the language.
35% of American women between the age of 26 and 65 hold a bachelor's degree, 22.4 % of Canadian women have obtained their degrees. More than 20% of Cambodian female adolescents do not attend school and less than 20% have any tertiary education at all, including universities, training schools or technical colleges.
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