The Last Thing You Want to Hear at 1am

amatuertrader · Post by **amatuertrader** » Fri Aug 21, 2020 3:54 am

I previously wrote that the last thing I wanted to hear at 1am was an air horn at a night club.

I have given that some thought and there are much worse things I would want to hear at 1am.

Like:

"Wake up, the house is on fire!"

"So this is the ugly slut is what you are willing to give up your wife and kids for!"

"I'm sorry sir, but you have end stage liver disease and only about 6 months left to live."

"If you can't come up with the money we are going to start cutting off your toes one by one with these pliers."

Yerg · Post by **Yerg** » Fri Aug 21, 2020 4:13 am

“My period is late...” Enough to send shivers down the spine. I’ll see your fire and pliers, and raise you this!!!!

simon43 · Post by **simon43** » Fri Aug 21, 2020 5:36 am

You're not gay - I identify as a woman...

amatuertrader · Post by **amatuertrader** » Fri Aug 21, 2020 5:39 am

"This is the front desk sir, your wife is drunk and she has a gun and she is on her way up."

amatuertrader · Post by **amatuertrader** » Fri Aug 21, 2020 5:58 am

From your new father-in-law:

"As soon as you go back to America I'm going to sell her back to the whorehouse."

Teddy1 · Post by **Teddy1** » Fri Aug 21, 2020 6:03 am

This is your fathers lawyer, Im sorry to tell you he has passed on and that he left his entire 500 million dollar estate to The Animal welfare league

amatuertrader · Post by **amatuertrader** » Fri Aug 21, 2020 6:21 am

Emergency room doctor:

"If someone could locate your penis, we might be able to re-attach it."

newkidontheblock · Post by **newkidontheblock** » Fri Aug 21, 2020 6:44 am

Yerg wrote:“My period is late...” Enough to send shivers down the spine. I’ll see your fire and pliers, and raise you this!!!!

Ummm.. that’s every month for me. Also, hearing that she must have gotten an STD/STI (from the water, from the food, from the toilet, etc.)

What would send shivers down my spine? Missus was run over by a big SUV and the okhna says it’s missus’ fault (for being on the road), and the police saying I must compensate the okhna for the damage to the monster car.

Kammekor · Post by **Kammekor** » Fri Aug 21, 2020 7:36 am

newkidontheblock wrote: ↑Fri Aug 21, 2020 6:44 am

Ummm.. that’s every month for me. Also, hearing that she must have gotten an STD/STI (from the water, from the food, from the toilet, etc.)

Nurse: Good morning sir. I will take care of you today. You look familiar by the way, do you know NKOTB? He's my husband.

Teddy1 · Post by **Teddy1** » Fri Aug 21, 2020 7:40 am

My EX just text me, "I love you"

The Last Thing You Want to Hear at 1am

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