Khmu Nation wrote: ↑Tue Aug 24, 2021 5:31 am There is always an exchange of something in any relationship, even if you are unlucky enough to go out with some super ambitious career woman back home. It's just played out in different ways.

Looking for 'love' is fine and dandy - when your 20 years old..But after a certain age relationships surely become an exercises in box ticking and practicality. For the man AND the woman.

Here are some of my boxes that need ticking -

Pretty
Reasonable
Responsible
Culturally aware
Potential good mother
Calm demeanor
Good family
Good relationship with her parents and siblings
Parents and siblings civil towards me
Great ass
Can cook
Great tits
Decent enough English
Slim
Non smoker
No drugs at all
Decent in the sack
Minimal or zero alcohol consumption
Aged 25 to 35
No children
]Single when you meet her
No ex husband
No former white long term boyfriend
Doesn't go out late at night
Has never been to an expat bar and doesn't want to go to one
Doesn't go to nightclubs
Doesn't like karaoke
Has a job when you meet her
Pays her own rent and bills when you meet her
Is keen to learn new things
Has some business acumen
Good with money
Is intelligent
Culturally curious
Has no desire to leave se Asia for life in the west
But will leave se Asia with you if that's the way things pan out
Has some good friends living nearby that she sees regularly
Can entertain herself when you are not around
Doesn't see you as a walking ATM
Understands that you have a past and there is usually a reason why you are living here
Is acceptable and accepted by your own family
Has never worked in a hooker/hostess bar in any capacity and has no friends that work in one either


The expats who end up with total nutter assholes are almost always total nutter assholes themselves.
Amen to that.

Doc67 wrote: ↑Tue Aug 24, 2021 9:40 am Good list, highlighted with my essentials and one extra.

But this list is for someone who want marriage and kids. I want neither (been there, done that) so finding a good one is a lot more difficult. If she has no kids the relationship is doomed. She will want marriage, she will want kids, she will, if she is intelligent, ask if that is what you want - her box ticking process.

For me, her need for more children is an absolute deal breaker, and if it comes up while out for dinner, it will likely be the last dinner.

violet wrote: ↑Tue Aug 24, 2021 9:08 am

Khmu Nation wrote: ↑Tue Aug 24, 2021 7:16 am

johnny lightning wrote: ↑Tue Aug 24, 2021 6:51 am Christ you don't want much do you? I would venture to say that NO woman is going to meet all those criteria, Khmer or not.

I didn't say all - I said 90%! My wife meets most of those criteria - admittedly she doesn't have a great ass or great tits. Very pretty face though.

I think there are loads and loads of women out here who meet most of the criteria. Thousands of them, hundreds of thousands of them in fact. But if you limit your search to a handful of expat bars, a couple of clip joints, a nightclub and tinder then it won't seem so. (Although I did meet my wife through badoo) If what is listed is too complicated or comes across as over-demanding and pedantic then here is the simplified version in FOUR BASIC RULES:

1 You almost certainly won't meet a good woman in SE Asia who is out on the town after seven in the evening.
2 You almost certainly won't meet a good woman in a bar out here - any time of day.
3 All the good women have a job when you first meet them - whether that be factory worker, nurse, ceo of a cosmetics company, it doesn't matter what job - but they will have a job.
4 All of the good ones are family orientated and will be in very regular touch with their parents and siblings.

Get those 4 boxes ticked and if you tick her boxes then you could be on to a winner. Yes, of course, there are exceptions to all rules and the hooker with the heart of gold might not be a myth. I am talking in broad strokes here, and based upon my own experiences, this isn't an exact science. This is the core of it all though:

If you want to meet a good woman you got to be a good man in the first place.

I only became a decent man 4 years ago, before that I was an irresponsible man child piece of shit liability alcohol and drug abusing barfly butthurt poor me asshole. Since becoming a responsible adult with values and who is accountable for my actions I have settled down with the best woman I have ever been with.

This isnt a coincidence

Follow my box ticks or the 4 Basic Rules. Finally, always remember she has her own boxes she needs to tick too!! So find out what those boxes are asap.

Thank me at your wedding.

Genuine question. Why is it you can have a history and reform, yet your partner should be free of that? Why does she not deserve the same second chance?