This topic evolved from another thread which was getting off topic as threads do. But I thought a thread on parenting issues in Cambodia might be of interest so here goes-starting with the origin from aforementioned thread.



taabarang wrote:
"sucks to be you then ay?"

I have a great life but I am a strict father. On a bad day my kids might say it sucks to be his kids.
Out of interest are they all yours? I find my wife's first daughter very difficult to deal with because she was brought up by old fashioned khmer people. Not saying hello and goodbye, that sort of thing"

First of all I have two kids(koan kaet). They are indeed mine although my wife certainly played an active role. We have been married 15 years and have a son and a daughter, aged 14 and 12. Well they're mine but of course I recognise them as Cambodian.

I do teach them English, not to keep my culture alive but to open doors for them in the future. We live rurally and while in general everything is fine there are some aspects of Cambodian culture I find unacceptable. Hygiene for example. Now when they are with their Cambodian friends they are free to act the way their friends do. However at home I expect Western values and English language especially when we have foreign guests. In short I want them to be bicultural as appropriate. After all the world isn't going to join Cambodia, Cambodia must join the world. I have more but that is enough to get the ball rolling.
cultural

Chew with your mouth closed. Say "please" and "thank you". General manners that will get you places seem to be a bit lacking. So I've got three, two girls 11 and 7, plus the boy who's 14 months. The boy drinks tea with milk and enjoys curry. I've got him pretty Anglicised, he calls me daddy and not pa or papa like the other two. The one in-between spent a lot of time living with my sister in law and her weirdo American boyfriend in her early years so her English needs work, she basically speaks Khmer but in English, things like "I school today" which I have to keep correcting. I've got her on the right path, she can eat with a knife and fork, but saying hello and goodbye when picking her up/dropping her off at school is not yet forthcoming. Still, she's a chatterbox and she goes full time to an international school so I'm not particularly concerned. The eldest, although half rice and half chips, seems to bear some sort of resentment to her Western heritage and has a tendency to fill her sister's head with nonsense about ghosts and all that bollocks. Generally refuses to eat Western food or speak English, despite spending five years having English lessons. Sleeps on the living room floor rather than in her bed. It is like I'm talking to a post or something, won't look me in the eye, turns around and goes off when I'm talking to her, tell her to do something she does something else. The number of times I've had to say - do you understand? Yes. OK, so why didn't you do it? No answer. Well!? Speak! *mumble* So you didn't understand? The whole khmer thing of trying to ferret out of responsibility. It's pretty tiresome. That's some weighty chip on her shoulder

WOW cpt you ring so many bells, especially with the weighty chip on the shoulder, that I'm going to take a breather and get back to you tomorrow.
Anyway glad you found the thread.

Oh my Buddha , Im glad I'm not the only one experiencing problems raising kids. I'd like to tell of some of my problems, but I am suffering a headache from banging my head against a brick wall.

"you state, "I do teach them English, not to keep my culture alive but to open doors for them in the future." good idea but does not help them without an education to get them into a good university, which, without an education, their job choices and future are VERY limited."

My wife and I work within the constraints of a very limited budget. We do all that we can, but if they want to study overseas they will have to get a scholarship. It's just how things are.

taabarang wrote:"you state, "I do teach them English, not to keep my culture alive but to open doors for them in the future." good idea but does not help them without an education to get them into a good university, which, without an education, their job choices and future are VERY limited."

My wife and I work within the constraints of a very limited budget. We do all that we can, but if they want to study overseas they will have to get a scholarship. It's just how things are.

I am curious as to what opportunities for a scholarship exist here.

We decided to go the languages route so they get Mandarin lessons as well. Doesn't matter so much about the quality of your education, you can get a decent job and the fill in the gaps later. Unfortunately khmer is not going to be of great help if you want to move somewhere that pays a decent wage. I mean sitting in on big business deals, not serving coffee

"I am curious as to what opportunities for a scholarship exist here."

Google the appropriate key words;there actually are a few out there. However ones from the Ministry of Ed are all but unobtainable by needy rural students. There are sewn up by the powers that be whose sons and daughters have attended private academies in Cambodia or studied HS overseas. Cronyism prevails, financial need is not a criteria.

Luigi, I forgot to mention this; be sure to check various foreign govt websites for scholarship possibilities. Going through them can eliminate the Ministry of ED as a middle man.